Requesting prayer for my Mother

                  

In regard to my Mom, I know I haven't been really putting updates in here on her and I need to be.  I get most of my info from my sister who lives in Milwaukee but now that I have my long-distance back I can actually call my Mom and her husband myself and here and there Mom has been on the computer and we have chatted.  For about a week or so she has had breathing issues.  The docs say she has some fluid built up in her lungs, but not enough to warrant surgery to drain it.  They prescribed a breathing therapy and she has been working on that but it is painful still.  This week she has been back and forth to doctors and getting ex-rays, a lot of activity for her and she has been worn out.  Last night I got a call from my sister saying that Mom was back in the hospital.  Her heart felt like it was doing flip flops like before the surgery and she couldn't breath.  Her husband rushed her to the ER Marcy was very upset, on the verge of tears.  Those thoughts of loosing Mom sprung into my head again. As I was talking to my sister I got a call on my second line (caller ID is a wonderful thing) and told Marcy I would call her back.  It was John, mom's husband to tell me himself what was going on. I could tell he was trying to be calm but I could still sense the emotion underneath it all.  He explained all that was going on with Mom and how they stabilized her heart rate and she will be getting a room at the hospital for the night and maybe into the next day too.  Her heart rate being up wasnt because of a malfuntion of her heart or the surgary but cuz of the meds she was on.  It all boils down to finding the right drugs for her body to keep her heart rate stable.  They had been monkeying around with them cuz of the fluid build up (I am told this is normal after a major surgery for you to develop fluid on your lungs).  I suggested that they should just keep her a few days and solve the whole fluid on the lungs thing while she was there.

I had just talked with Mom yesterday morning onthe computer.  We both was up early because we couldn't sleep. Each of us with our own ouchies but ofcourse hers is much worse than my sore mouth.  She was joking asking if I wanted to trade places.  She asked me to e-mail her pics of her in the ICU after the surgery because the doctors said it would be good for her to see how far she has come since then.  She is also fighting a minor depression, also considered normal.  She even told me she had been praying to The Lord for strength and to lift her depression.

It seems to me like her recovery has had many, many snags in it but I am assured these are normal.  I wouldn't rate her recovery as speedy at all, she is been having a real hard time of it.  Ofcourse I am not there with her and tend to worry because I don't get to really see her and her progress.  I still have a picture of her in my head in her hospital bed, lol it may be good for ME to see an updated pic of her, like it was good for her to see a pic of herself in ICU.  But really, I am not stressing so much over it all.  I have left it in God's hands and I am not going to take it back onto myself.

 all for praying for my family and my mother.

                  

IS the knot already being tied on your Churches hands to Preach God's Will?

"Stewardship suggestion of the week: Have you, your church and your pastor considered the IRS restrictions on political activity by churches? Are you aware of what they are and should they be changed? Those two questions are addressed in separate articles in our Headliners section. To read more about this issue, visit  http://www.thegoodsteward.com/article.php3?articleID=2176 and http://www.thegoodsteward.com/article.php3?articleID=2177 "

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    MUST READ ARTICLES!!!!!  I HAD NO IDEA THERE WAS SO MUCH RESTRICTION ON OUR CHURCHES! If these laws don't change the slipper slope is coming and churches wont be able to speak out on things like Abortion, Homosexuals, and maybe to the point where they wont be able to preach about the Endtimes because that will be Political since the One World Order Government will be headed by An Ant-Christ and his mouth piece will be a False Prophet.  Reading what I have, I think it maybe better for churches to just give up that tax exempt status just so they are not under the thumb of the government and have true freedom to preach the Word of God without fear.

Who do you put YOUR HOPE IN??

YESSSSSS PLEASEEEEEEE SPARE US FROM MUDSLINGING CAMPAINS!

I did sit threw the whole speech Kerry gave lastnight, the only speech I watched from the convention.  I wish I had wrote down my thoughts as he was giving them cuz I did find my self talking at the t.v. a few times.  I will give him this, who ever worked on his makeup did a good job, he didn't look as scary as he usually does.  And I rated the speech as good, not great but good.  There was a few things that did get my goat and maybe after looking at the full speech in print I can write on it. I am glad the convention is over. I wonder if the news will give the same coverage for the Republican one? I wonder how much of the speeches are written by the people giving them?  I know they have speech writers and all that, but isn't the point of giving a speech being it is something you yourself want to say, not words put in your mouth? How much better or worse would Public Officials Speeches be if they actually wrote them themselves? LOL I do find myself kinda sad over just how divided our country is on all the issues. How can anything get done when one half of the country hates the other's views? How much can a President really do anyway? I have seen two in my adult life, from different parties, both saying they will do this or that, yet don't do even half of what they set out to do because of Congress or the Senate controlled by opposing parties. My husband would say that is a good thing, gives restriction on what a President can do, a leash if you will, that is why he voted for a republican president and a democrat senate. *eyerolling here* I don't think of myself as very political but I keep my eyes open and watch what's being said, I don't always post it here. I know you have to look beyond what the press says because often they don't give the full story or have their own slant on it. I have come to loath the commentary the anchor ppl give and how they try and interpret everything for you, like we cant think for ourselves. I think I have come to the conclusion of who I will vote for but also that really it doesn't matter too much who I want in there.  Ultimately it is up to God who he brings to power and who he brings down but here in America we have a voice in the process and my fear is God will give America just what she wants.  And then we are in for an even bigger mess but America don't complain and don't whine, you got what you asked for. Really I don't see much hope in any politician, they say they work for you and your interest, but it is true of both parties, its who has the money to donate to their campaigns they listen to or who gets their attention the most, thus lobbyist have a job.   I vote my values and my conscious and put my Hope in God.

CELABRATE GOOD TIMES!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY J~LAND!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

The comunity known has J~Land is all aglow with celbration of its first aniversery!  If AOL wanted to find a way to hook customers and keep them dispite bad customer service, and dispite numurous tecnical issues, the brain child of Journals or Blogs was certainly the way to go.  I know personaly it is one of the major resoans I keep my account up and running and fight with my husband to keep AOL even though we have ISP thru our phone company at a cheaper rate.  What is it about J~Land that keeps us here?  Why do we stay and set up house and keep touch with fellow neibors?  It is not like chat rooms or personal webpages, or message boards,it is so more.  Apperantly Blogs have been around for some time and AOL just picked up on the idea and expanded it.  I supose we in J~Land have that coman bond because we are all AOL customers but even more we are all human with something to share.  Most of us who started journaling started it just for our own personal diary, something new to play with on AOL and it has turned in to an experance of connecting with others and still telling our own stories.  We give of ourselves in each entry and get more back when others share thier comments and thier own journals and life stories.  I have made many marvouls friends here and have connected on a personal level with many of the journals.  We teach each other and we learn from each other.  Ofcourse being the multi fauset commuinty that J~Land is there has been some clashes of world views and opinons but even thru those we have learned and grown.  Some would say it is self absorbed to have your life put out there on the net, and even dangrous, and to some degree this may be true, but life is not worth living with walls and boundires that protect the heart.  So I will say thank YOU AOL for this service to us and for launching it a year ago.  Many have come and gone this year but many more have stayed and set up thier own little corner of the Web and many more will come.  As I was telling my friend who was wondering why she wasnt getting many hits on her journal, Write it and they will come, write for yourself first and the rest of the comunity will come to you to see what you have to say.  All else is just bonus. Ofcourse it helps to visit others journals and leave a nice note with your link so they can come and find you .

I know there is much dado going on over the first year anv. and I have tried to keep up with it all but this last month seems to of been a train wreck with many issues, so I have not been able to contribute much to the festivities.  I wish I could of done more and been apart of the torch and the floats and all the other goodies that is going on.  Next year we will have an even bigger celebration for sure!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY J~LAND.  KEEP WRITTING, KEEP IT TRUE, KEEP IT REAL, THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR LIFE STORIES WITH ME AND FOR ALLOWING ME TO SPEAK INTO YOUR LIVES!

My Day with a dentist apointment

Ohh what a day..

I was up bright and early today to take Josh to work so I could have the van. I didn't take any pain pills cuz I knew I would be driving and also I didnt think I would need them as much, especialy thinking the dentist wasnt going to pull the tooth yet but just look at it and give me a script for antiboticts. But I put two in my pocket just incase. Josh is working all the way in Clayton at WashU, about an hour drive from our house. I did remember to wish him HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! And Ohhhh he made the most lovely comment about how I looked.  He said I looked like a Who from the movie the Grinch (note the puffy cheeks).Then I got back home and kept trying to get ahold of Amy to see if she would watch Lilly and Sophia while I was at the dentist apointment.  We had talked last night but nothing was settled cuz she was thinking she might have to go to a baseball game, it was still to be anounced. Her phone was busy most of the morning!  My apointment was for 8:45.  So I was bracing myself for taking all four kids to the dentist with me.  I HAD TO GO!  I took a shower and got the kids cleaned up and dressed. Fed them some breakfast.  8:15 I decided to try Amy's one more time and got threw.  She still wasnt sure if there was a game or not but said she would watch the little ones but to leave some money incase of the game cuz it cost to get in.  No biggie, I owe her big time for all she has done for us with me going out of town, so I left her $15 and told her to keep it either way.  We didnt get to her house till 8:35, so I was running late.  Zane and Annie and Me made it to the dentist office just at 8:55.  The receptionist was real nice and she asked if I was Mary as soon as I walked in.  I think she could tell cuz of my swollen cheek. lol  So I fill out the paper work and all that fun stuff you got to do as a new patient.  Annie was playing with Legos and Zane was reading a magazine.  On the paper work it asked if you ever had a bad experance with a dentist before and if so explain.  All I could say was YES and put down he was mean .  I have had some doozies before, mostly from childhood, but the dentists for the most part that I have encountered have been nice but scoulding me for my poor care of my teeth.  I wasn't too stressed over this apointment.  I have been told by about everyone that if it was to be pulled it probly wont be on the first apointment cuz I will certainly need meds first for about a week.  I wasn't looking forward to him looking in my mouth and giving me that 'tisk tisk' sound.  So when I got called back I told him the prob, asked him to PLEASE not yell at me or scould me, cuz they are perty bad.   (ok maybe NOT that bad, but close engh). He smiled and said oh no he isnt like that at all. This dentist is young, probly just a bit, if that older than me and his office is very plesant.  I explained my situation and what the last dentist told me and how we have one income and 4 kids and so my dentail needs have always been put on hold. He took the pamaromic x-rays and a bite wing one of the infected area.  I had told him I had the full mouth ones about 13 months ago and that I know my ins wont cover them, but he said HE NEEDED THEM and they will file a claim and if anything work something out later. (ya thats going cost a pertty penny I bet).  I did say to him that we could just pull them out and get me false teeth, he kinda wrinkled his nose at that idea and said we'll disscuss options at my next apointment. (ya right, all the work he could do could probly pay off his student loans) It was just as I thought, an abcest, infection, big time!  But to my shock he wanted to pull it right then and now!  I asked him are you sure cuz I had been hearing other wise from everyone else.  He said since it was a top tooth it was ok, on the bottom teeth they mostly wait a week but on the top they can do it right away and he didnt feel good about waiting, lest it spread and get worse. But If I wanted to wait we could, up to me.  I was not prepared for that.  I had to brace myself and wrap my mind around it for a second.  The worst part of it all was the needle used to do the numbing. Hurt like a Son of a **&&(   Yes I cried like a baby. I sat for about 20-30 for it to take full effect and while doing that I poped a pain pill.  I also went to the lobby to check the kids.  The receptionist said they are great, hadnt heard a peep from them.  Still reading and playing with the legos.  As I sat in the chair getting ready for what was next I over heard the dentist talking with a lady.  The back where we sit is perty much just partions so it was easy to hear.  She was complaining of a filling that food kept getting stuck on and oh what about teeth whiting and oh what about that invisoline for her crooked back teeth.  I was thinking, sheesh, if only that is all I had to worry about.  I started to cry some for how bad my teeth was compaired to this other person who was about the same age as me.  Hers was a vainty apointment, mine was an emergancy, I know I shouldnt do that.  I started to pray as the tears droped, asking the Lord to help me threw, To be MY STRENTH, TO BE MY SHIELD,To BE MY STRONG TOWER, To BE HELP IN TIME OF NEED. HE HAS SET MY FEET ON A ROCK AND I SHALL NOT BE MOVED. The assistant walked in on me and saw me crying and asked if I was ok.  I said YES, I was just praying. She shruged her shoulders and walked out.  Then it was time.  He sat down and I told him how I was just thinking how I missed smiling. I used to have a big toothy grin. He said he was going to talk to me about that later and that he understood.  Less than a min. the rest of the broken tooth came out.  I will say this about him, at least he does exstractions!  Over the last few years all the dentists I have had dont do them, they refer you to a specialist. He then wrote me scripts for pain pills and Amoxicillin.  Sigh of relief.  Now my friends dont have to be my drug dealers and I have my own pain pills (don't worry I am thinking of you AJournaler, I wont become an addict)  My total bill I had to pay was $61.00  Our ins. is 80/20 up to a thousand each year and the new year for them starts in Oct.  I made the follow up apointment and also apointments for the kids to get cleanings.  The ladies in the office gave the kids big bright balloons and ofcourse I had to aske for two more.  There woudld of been some major fighting going on with just two balloons and 4 kids to share them.Then off to Walgreens to fill my scripts.  About a 20 min wait there so we looked around, found a 3 piece set of ponies for Sophia but nothing for Josh, besides he already got a b-day present over the weekend from me.  The soundtrack to Cold Mountian and the DVD set of the Second Season of that show The Shield.  I org wanted to get him a nice gold chain to put his wedding ring on, he isnt suposed to wear his ring at work for safty reasons but Wal-Mart only had short girly ones, oh well maybe Christmas. My total bill at Walgreens was 20 bucks. I took another pain pill and then got gas.  All in all I spent just over $100 today!!!  Then we hung out at Amy's till I had to leave to get Josh.  It was good for me to chill out over there before having to do all that driving. On the way I had my window open and wouldn't ya know it, Sophia let go of her ballon and it flew out! You know we have been hearing about that all night. Then JUST as I was turning into the Parking Lot to get him I miss judged the curb and hit it and blew a tire!! Oiy!  I drove on it to where I had to meet him.  He was waiting with the rest of the crew he had worked with today.  They jumped into action to help, like a pit crew lol.  But ofcourse it couldnt be a simple thing, it had to be complicated.  We didnt have a jack, and the other guys didnt have one that would go high engh, they had to do some creative jacking and then the spare tire on the back of the van wouldnt come off. They had to take the whole bar off the van with the tire on it, eventaly taking it to a welding shop at the school and welded the pesky bolt off that was holding us up.  Took 45 min in all.  It was very nice of the guys to help, cuz they had worked threw lunch so they could leave early.  I offered to bbq for them all some time and one said he may take me up on that.  The guys Josh work with are crude, and gritty but have good hearts. So we got home and all worn out.  We opted not to go to church tonight and Josh cooked dinner.  He also made some BIG BIRTHDAY COOKIES for desert. 

And the biggest surprise for me tonight and most impressive, The Dentist called ME, himself, not his office, and on his own phone (i have caller id) at almost 8:00 to check on me, to make sure I was doing better and all that.  I have NEVER known a dentist to do that, sure have the office call but not personaly.  Maybe he is the answer to my prayers???

Catching up

Well I am back baby!  DSL UP and running.  aww speed, ohh the power lol. It only took several calls to my phone company and tec support, hours on hold and mega frustration.

Our weekend went nicely.  I have tons of catching up to do on journals. I am tempted to just delet all that is in my box and catch up as the new alerts come in.  

What is it about Wasps and Sophia????? They must really hate her!  The last two times she has been stung while visiting over at Josh's moms.  Only her.  I can't find a nest or any of them flying around yet they find her.  My poor baby.  And then Monday in our own yard she got stung again! Twice!..  I have scoured the yard for those ugly nests and nothing.  I did learn about baking soda taking the sting out.  At least we know she is not alergic like her father is.  When he was a kid he kicked a nest up or something and got stung sooooo many times and he was rushed to the ER.  Ever since then he has been allergic to any kind of sting.

My mouth pain has kicked up again over the weekend.  So much so that I accepted a few pain pills from a friend last night. Hydrocodone (sp?)  I took one at thier house and one when I got home and then another one before I went to bed.  It nocked me out and I slepted allllll day today.  I got out of bed at 3:00 and my face was swollen!  The swelling has gone down some.  I was going to go to the hospital but Josh instead made me a dentist apointment.  Ofcourse I cant get in till the moring.  I know its not cuz of the pills, but cuz I have an infection. So here we go, here it all starts.  The fun of going to a dozen of dential apointments, finding rides there and sitters, oh and the money to pay for it all what the insurance wont.  How much does it cost ya think to get them all nocked out and get dencures?? : P

Happier note.  Today is Sophia's Birthday!!!  HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY.  She ofcourse wants a pony.  I thought she ment a my little pony doll but nope, she was talking about one she could ride on lol.  Keep draming dear.

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Good times, Daily household stuff and Blessings.

OMG!! Just had the greatest of fun with Kara from BrandNewDAy.  We have decided to make Journals Cafe our haunt when we are up late online.  So if you are on past 12 or so, drop in on us.  I am sure with in a week it will be an all out J~Land fest in there.  In fact, and Kara agree with me here, I think AOL should pay me and Kara too ofcourse, to be nightly hosts.  All the baby journalers there, man, I feel like a Journal guru and you know I know about as much as the next seasoned Journaler.  Today I was explaining to a guy how to hyper link a link in his about me section so the column wouldn't take up all his journal and another person on how to drop and drag the heart to make a link in the room and advising another on how to start one all together.  But I did have fun tonight with Kara, she is easy to get along with and a dear friend.  So HEY AOL cough up the money for our community service here! lol

Other tid bits from the day..

Did you know they changed the nickel?? The back is different, in commemoration of the Louisiana Purchase.  My son pointed it out to me today.  He is a stickler for detail sometimes.  That that was interesting.

I am thisssss close to getting my DSL back!! Paying off the rest of the bill tomorrow morning, crossing my fingers that it will be up and running by Friday.  Now, if I can remember how to hook it back up, since you cant have dial up and dsl enabled at the same time and it's been what feels like a year since I disconnected it.  Have I told you that DIAL UP SUCKS!!!??? 

I made meatloaf and home made mash potatoes for dinner.  I even started it early so we could eat at a decent hour.  My husband came home and took a whiff and said, "What did I do to deserve this??" I told him he puts up with me and that is all the reason to make him one of his fav dishes.  Truth be told, I was just stumped on what to make, so there we go. Tomorrow, Spaghetti.  Oh ya, I better take out the ground turkey to defrost.  Thanks for reminding me!

Church was good tonight, just a recap about the last few lesions. Ya ya I know, I need to update my other journal with the new lesions.  I WILL get to it.  I did blush tonight when our Pastor mentioned using ppls talents and that Mary is going to help with some of the web stuff.  When they do have the other section of the church website up and running I have volunteered to add news links and such that pertain to the endtimes.  No biggie.  Guess I should be paying more attention to the news huh.  Truth be told, I wish I could do more.

I did get a big blessing though.  It has a back ground story to it so bare with me. ..

As you know I have a big family, 4 kids and two adults.  And as such we require a big car or van to transport us all around, if we all want to go to the same place.  My van has been dead for about six months now and we have been down to one car, an old 82 wagon. We all fit ok in there but it has an oil leak and water leak plus the tags was up on it July 1st.  It has been in the shop so we could get it all on the up and up to get the tags.  Plus we have to pay last years taxes on it, get an updated insurance card too. Mucho money time.  So we have been using Josh's Aunt and Uncle's car the last two weeks. FYI they live 3 hours away and Josh has been over there on the weekends painting their house for them, and this is the last weekend he planed on being over there.  And its a small car where we can only fit two of the kids in there at a time (has airbags so no kids in front) Soooo we was hoping to have the wagon out of the shop and with tags by Friday.  BUT If we did that we wouldn't be able to pay up on all these pesky things called bills (some disconnect notices too).  I wasn't stressing over it, a bit bummed that it was going to take even LONGER to get my dsl back and that we couldn't go anywhere as a family the last two weeks.  Then tonight after church someone asked me if we wanted a van they have.  It doesn't have air and one of the windows sticks, but other than that it works great.  Too good to be true, I asked lol if the tags are updated and all that lol and yes they are, just felt like we needed it greater than they did. My jaw drops, and I tell them about the situation we was in and how we probably could use it by this weekend since we have to go to ILL.   \o/Thank YOU LORD!  It is always amazing how he provides and gives us more than we could even think of, blessings abound.  Haven't even told Josh yet!

 

 

A few good links to consider

  Technorati: Top 100 AOL Journals never heard of Technorati but aperntly he has heard of me.  Alot of our faves are on THE LIST.  Not sure how it works, but it's neat-0.  This is the AOL ONLY LIST, there is another one for all blogs out there on the World Wide Web.   

 Special Interests - Journals Cafe Is where I am/was haning out.  Met a few new ppl and got a few new journal links to read.  Now if I could only make the B2B chats!  But this one is good too.  Always there, always open and new ppl who are into journaling to meet.  Felt kinda guilty pimping out my journal link, but hey, thats what the room is for? lol

Jib Jab

ok you have to go to JibJab.com to see it, I admit, I stole the pic off thier website.

 

We was flipping threw the evening bla bla bla and on one of the news shows there was a clip of this and a bit about the company JibJab.  I dont have my dsl up at the moment (I will say it again, DIAL UP SUCKS) so I all I was able to see was what was on T.V.  But from what I saw, it is the funniest thing on the net.  Why Am I just now finding out about JibJab????  I must be lame!  Console me and tell me I am not lame, that you too didnt know about this lol and if you did, SHAME ON YOU for not clueing me in! 

 Let me know what you think.

From the Laugh and Lift daily e-mail I get. This got my heart pumping. Amen.

 

He Is!

He is the First and Last,
the Beginning and the End!
He is the keeper of Creation
and the Creator of all!

He is the Architect of the Universe
and the Manager of all times.
He always was,
He always is,
and He always will be . . .
Unmoved,
Unchanged,
Undefeated,
and never Undone!

He was bruised and brought healing!
He was pierced and eased pain!
He was persecuted and brought freedom!
He was dead and brought life!
He is risen and brings power!
He reigns and brings Peace!

The world can't understand him,
The armies can't defeat Him,
The schools can't explain Him,
and the leaders can't ignore Him.

Herod couldn't kill Him,
The Pharisees couldn't confuse Him, and
The people couldn't hold Him!

Nero couldn't crush Him,
Hitler couldn't silence Him,
The New Age can't replace Him,
and non-believers can't explain Him away!

He is Light,
Love,
Longevity,
and Lord.

He is Goodness,
Kindness,
Gentleness,
and God.

He is Holy,
Righteous,
Mighty,
Powerful,
and Pure.

His ways are right,
His Word is eternal,
His will is unchanging,
and His mind is on me!

He is my Redeemer,
He is my Savior,
He is my Guide, and
He is my Peace!

He is my Joy,
He is my Comfort,
He is my Lord, and
He rules my life!

I serve Him because His bond is love,
His burden is light,
and His goal for me is abundant life.

I follow Him because He is the Wisdom of the wise,
the Power of the powerful, the Ancient of Days,
the Ruler of rulers,
the Leader of leaders,
the Overseer of the overcomers,
and the Sovereign Lord of all that was, and is and is to come.

And if that seems impressive to you, try this for size . . .

His goal is a relationship with me!

He will NEVER leave me,
NEVER forsake me,
NEVER mislead me,
NEVER forget me,
NEVER overlook me,
and NEVER cancel my appointment in His appointment book!

When I fall, He lifts me up!

When I fail, He forgives!

When I am weak, He is strong!

When I am lost, He is the way!

When I am afraid, He is my courage!

When I stumble, He steadies me!

When Iam hurt, He heals me!

When I am broken, He mends me!

When I am blind, He leads me!

When I am hungry, He feeds me!

When I face trials, He is with me!

When I face persecution, He shields me!

When I face loss, He provides for me!

When I face Death, He carries me Home!

He is everything for everybody,
everywhere,
every time,
and every way.

He is God!
He is Faithful.
I am His,
and He is mine!

My Father in Heaven can whip the father of this world.
So, if you're wondering why I feel so secure, understand this . . .
He said it and that settles it.

God is in control,
I am on His side,
and that means all is well with my soul.
Everyday is a blessing for GOD Is!

May Grace and Peace be multiplied unto you.

 

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No your Not a baby, But YOU ARE MY BABY

Sophia, Sophia, Sophia!  What I am I to do with YOU. 

For my loyal readers you know Sophia is my baby.  The last of the babies I will ever have. The youngest of my four little darlings.  Her birthday is closely approaching this month on the 27th where she will turn 3.  In so many ways I want to hang on to her being little and enjoy the milestones of her life.  When she stopped nursing I cried.  When she started to crawl I cried.  When she started walking I cried.  And YES when she started to potty train I bawled my eyes out!  For surely that is the sign your baby is Turing into a big girl and doesn't need you as much.  She has come to that time in her little life where she hates being called baby.  "NO MOM, I am A BIG GIRL, NOT A BABY" And she will flash you her big girl undies to prove it! (sometimes I wonder if I am raising a little stripper, she does the pole dance and the booty dance too).

I fought the potty training tooth and nail, put it off as long as I could. But once we started there was no turning back.  We got the potty seat that goes on the toilet and the little step stool.  We got the pull-ups or should I say expensive diapers dismissed as something to feel good about spending more money on. After a few months of some success and being broke and not able to buy the pull-ups we went to the big girl undies.  Dora the Explorer is her fav ofcourse.  And now that we don't have to tote around the extra luggage of a diaper bag with us every where we go. I am glad and feel a bit more free.  This is one of the big rewards of having a potty trained toddler and my husband reminds me of this each time I bring up wanting another baby.

She has become very self efficient with the potty training and I would say she is trained and done.  She goes whenever she needs to without being asked, she just goes.  Success! And a new chapter opens for her.  That was until my last trip up North.  While I was gone she did perfectly fine.  No accidents or anything. So Josh says and Amy who watched her while I was gone.  And I didn't expect there to be any either.  I have been home now for almost 2 weeks but something isn't right with my little one.  Every day that I have been home she has had an accident, sometimes two to three times a day!! I am cranking out her laundry overtime. What is the cause of this reverting???  The only factor I can think of is ME being gone and now me being back home.  Is it for attention?  Is it cuz she is playing and doesn't want to stop and take the time to go?  Often it happens right in front of the toilet.  She just doesn't get her pants down fast enough, or so she says.  Today was the pinnacle of it all, when she actually dropped a big LOAD in her pants!  I can understand peeing but now POOPING!  It was time for a conversation with her.

Ohh Sophia why did you do that?  Why didn't you wait till you was on the potty?  In toddler talk only a mom can understand : "I don't know.  Annie Made made me do it, its Lilly's fault"  (trying to lay blame on her sisters) Honey you can't poop in your pants like this. Pooping in your pants is yuckie.  Now I have to wipe you with the baby wipes, like a baby. Do I have to start putting diapers on you again? " NOOOO I am a Big Girl, those are for BABIES!, but mommy, I am your baby right? (with an evil smirk on her face)" Yes you are always going to be my baby, but you are my big girl too. Right? "Yes, get me new undies mommy" OK but only if you try not to pee or poop in them.

And off she went to play..

Are YOU a Good person?

Got this passed along to me in an e-mail.  A quiz I recomend everyone taking.

 

Are you a good person?       

 

 

(, I didn't pass as a good person)

I'm A Smoker, I'm A Joker, I'm A Midnight Toker...

This post has been inspired by LivingOnTheEdge.  Check it out and read my comments in the post from yesterday.  Honesty with ourselves is always the best policy, and honesty in my journal is what I have always claimed to uphold. Sometimes I do ommit some of the grimmer me, the not so polished parts.  I do this sometimes because no one wants thier shame to be out there to air in the public and you just dont know who really reads you.  And ofcourse I want to look good, promote a positve image, be well liked and bla bla bla.  Well thats not the org. intent of my journal, it is for me and my thoughts and you guys are just along for the ride.  Right? Right!

I have never made it a secret that I used to be a drug user or why I would use drugs. No not the hard drugs, but drugs nonthe less.  When I came to the Lord all the reasons I used them became nill and void.  Yet if I am honest here, and that is what I am claiming to be right, I did keep smoking pot and poping a pill here and there when I had them. My excuse was then, Oh it helps me unwind in the evenings after the kid-os are in bed, sex is better and bla blab bla..  .But it didn't take me long to come to the conclusion that I could not serve two masters or be High in the presance of The Lord. The thing was getting in the way with my relationship with the Lord and after much prayer I heard it loud and clear that I MUST give it up. My disre to be high dwindled and I stopped seeking it out. Yet some how the joints would find thier way to me, with out me even asking.  This is funny since most of my smoking friends either lived in Wis or dropped me because I became a Christian. It was easy to say NO when it wasnt in my face but when it falls in your lap, thats a differnt story. I had an inner strugle going on that is for sure. It came to the point where I had to tell this well meaning friend to "Get Ye Behind ME Satan" meaning stop offering me the stuff, cuz I will almost always say yes, dont even talk about it with  me anymore.

That being said flash forward to my recent trip up North.

 You can guess why my friends are laughing.  And you can guess who is laughing right along with them.

Funny how sooooooo easy it is to fall back into old patterns. I dont want to bust my friends out by giving thier names so I will call them Ding and Dong for this post (lol). Nice looking gals arnt they? Suburbain, hard working, mothers and faithful wives.  Not your averge image of a pot head. Oh but don't you be fooled, these two right here, that is what floats thier boat all the way to thier Fablaled Zimbaway.  If they had to go a month with out weed, OMG, life would be about over for them.  Thier whole lives center around it, and so does thier whole friendship. Ding and Dong have been best friends since pre-teens and I have known them since HIGHSchool. Oh the many long nights we have had partying.  Now dont give me that look, I am not talking them down, this is pure truth and they would back me up, horrified that I posted a pic of them, but they would say I wasn't fibbing and they are confesed potheads. No it hasn't got in the way of thier jobs or family life (yet) so they dont see anything wrong with it. Dong on the right there would even call Mary Jane her religion.

My own confession is they didnt have to peer-presure me into it over my trip, they didnt shove the pipe in frount of my noise chanting "SMOKE, SMOKE, SMOKE".  I perfectly KNEW from the very first of plans being made for me to see them that I surley would dance with old Mary Jane. Even looking forward to it.  And it's not like it was just one time, but several that I hit the pipe unapolgeticly holding down deep down in my lungs and slowling exhaling and waiting for the glazzy wolrd to come.  The worst part of it all, and I begged Ding (on the left) not to do it while I was there, was the talk we had with Ding's 13yrd little sister who was staying with her.  Apparently thier mom found effidance that miss 13yrs was smoking the stuff and thought she had her own pipe and wanted Big Sister to have a chat with her about it. I told her WHAT EVER YOU DO, DONT DO IT WHILE WE ARE HIGH! But ofcourse it was more funny to do it that way.  What should of been a serious talk with a young girl about the bad things of this world and how she could be better than that turned into a big laughing matter, cuz who can be serous when you are telling someone NO dontdo that, when you yourself are flying up in the clouds.  AND THAT is where my real shame is.  Not that I failed myself so much, I know God will councile me, take me in his arms and sooth me like the child who wandered away for a few days, no its what this child has walked away thinking after our meeting and how poor of a witness I was to those around me.  I would go as far as saying I have a broken and contrite heart over the whole matter.  The seeds planted was not seeds from God, I was walking in my flesh not my spirit. 

Psalms 51 A Prayer of Salvation

Psalms 51:1 <<To the chief Musician, A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet came unto him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba.>> Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.

2 Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.

3 For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin [is] ever before me.

4 Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done [this] evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, [and] be clear when thou judgest.

5 Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.

6 Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden [part] thou shalt make me to know wisdom.

7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

8 Make me to hear joy and gladness; [that] the bones [which] thou hast broken may rejoice.

9 Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

11 Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.

12 Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me [with thy] free spirit.

13 [Then] will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee.

14 Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: [and] my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness.

15 O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise.

16 For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give [it]: thou delightest not in burnt offering.

17 The sacrifices of God [are] a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If ever there was a prayer of salvation in the Old Testiment, here it is.  David has given us so many beautiful songs in the Psalms and here is one you can see where he was broken by and on his face for forgivness.  In this one song there are so many truths, as the Word does not come back void.   

Is this your song today? I am struck by the last few parts.  God doesn't disre sacrifices, but a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart.  Is your heart broken today, are you broken today?  Do you reconize YOU have sinned and deseve God's judgment?    Ask him to give you a right spirit, a clean heart, to give you the Joy of HIS salvation, and it is yours as a gift. He will blot out your trangressions, he will wash you and you will be clean as snow.  He will cast your sins as far as the east is from the west.  East and West may not sound very far to you, but if you notice, East and West never do meet, so your sins will never meet in God's sight, IF you ask him for forgivness, you will get it recive him.                   

Dream A Little Dream Of Me

 

Normally I do not remember my dreams of the night before.  There are the rare occasions that they are so vivid and strange that I wake up going where did that come from?.  Last night I had one of those dreams but I think I know what influenced it.

I dreamed of Nuclear Fall Out and what my family would go threw if such an event happened close to home.  It was horrible!!!!!  A nightmare if there ever was one!  The worst was not knowing what happen to our family across the country and hanging in for reports over a radio that never came. Scolding my children for drinking the water that is surely contaminated and watching a cat we had die (we don't own any pets). And the fear of knowing that soon you would die too from radiation poisoning.  I remember the flash in the sky and how I looked down to the grown cuz I knew if I looked right at it I would be blinded.  Apparently in the dream it didn't happen right over us but it was close engh for us to see it from a far off distance.

I know where this all came from, Darn YOU Stephen King! lol and a program on tv about why a terrorist would love to get ahold of a nuclear bomb.  Last weekend we saw a movie at Josh's mom's house called "The Day After."  It was a movie made in the early 80's, made for tv I think.  And it was set in MO not too far from Kansas City.  It totally killed my thoughts on how safe I was from such things cuz I lived in the middle of the country.  But the movie was about the fall out and what ppl could go threw. So that contributed to it.  Then last night I started reading Wolves Of The Calla, the V book of The Dark Tower Series.  It is apparent that the charters in that version of earth are living after such a horrible war and they are the decedents after thousands of years. (If you read The Dark Tower books you know that its not just about that and has so many twists and turns it can be hard to keep up).

So I woke up today thinking how unprepared we are for anything like that and how we need to stock pile water and food and yes, build a bomb shelter.  But really what I was thinking is if we do ever get bombed I hope that I would die under the first wave and it would happen in my sleep.

This all feeds into my survivor's fear thing.  For years I had dreams of us having to be prepared for anything and us having to be ready at the drop of a hat to get out of town fast.  This lead to my obsession with camping stuff and my dream of one day owning an Army Hummer.  Not those new fancy ones but the old ones that could run over anything and take you on the ruff terrain.  This is also why I want to learn how to hunt, so if we had to, we could kill and eat what we need.  When Peachy wrote about what would happen last month if they won the lottery and about making a bunker out in no where, I was shaking my head YES. LOL.

Over the years I have calmed down about stockpiling and preparing.  But just incase, next payday I am going to buy a supply of bottled water and beef jerky.  That will help me feel a bit better.

Attention span of a fly

Some may aurge I have ADD or some may say I just get distracted easy.  I say I just have a bunch of stuff on my mind and it is hard to focus lately on anything but thoughts of my mom.  Last night I went to church for the endtimes class.  Josh DID NOT go last week and take notes for me like I asked him to. I wont go into rant mode about that, letting it go.. I figured I would just get a tape of last week and take notes off of that. No tape was avalible and copeys need to be made. So I am waiting on that.  Anyways I was trying to take diligent notes this week, the subject is "Will Jesus Appear at the Rapture?"  I am thinking Duh! ofcourse but apernatly there is a school of thought out there that thinks the rapture is going to be quick and quiet and the lession was on the scriptures that point to where he says over and over he will appear and about his milenila rein also, two separte events ofcourse.  I tried taking good notes, writting down the scripture refrances, but ofcourse my mind wondered to my mom and the what ifs..  I still have to post my notes from the class I went to before I left, The Rapture and the Shabua Principle, showing how God divides things in 7s and that the seventh always belongs to him.

I am trying to get back to somewhat normal homelife. Getting back into the swing of things having all four of my children here and keeping up with the house.  Josh did do a good job of keeping it half way decent and I am trying to improve on it.  The dishes are being kept up, the laundry is getting done, and the bedrooms (at least the kids rooms) are clean.  The floors are good and the dusting is getting done.  When does school start back up!?? lol  Josh is graduating to 3rd year apprentice at the end of the month! This means a raise in pay, a big one! And just one more year til he is journeymen and at full scale.  He is talking about a job that may take him out of town for a few months?! I am not happy about this idea, but I have known it has always been a possiblity.  But for now it doesnt look like he will be going untill his company gets a waiver from the school for him missing classes due to being out of town.  I wont hold my breath.  Anyways I am excited that he will be getting a big raise and that we maybe getting caught up soon and be able to start to save.  I still plan on taking a job this fall but not sure where and the whens.  Just something to get us threw winter, we dont want a repeat of this last one. But hopfuly, this winter will not be as slow as the last for Josh's work.  Our car is in the shop and we are currently using Josh's aunt and uncles. But we have it just till this weekend, when josh goes back over to ILL to finish painting thier house.  So I hope the shop calls us soon saying they have looked at our car and can fix it fast, we need to renew the plates (they expired last month)

I think I am fighting off depression or fatige.  I have decided after looking at my pics of me in it from my trip that I need to diet.  I hate how fat I have become, and didnt relize I was that big.  Over the winter I dieted and was down a few sizes and I thought I was doing good.  But ever since all this stuff with my mom has happen I have gone into craving junk food mode. So I am turning a new leaf and I may even exersize some lol. My snack food of choice is going to be either these yummy dried fruit morsels or a slim fast bar.  I am not ready to go back to the shake thing twice a day, trying not to spend too much money yet.  I know everyone is crazy for the low carb diet stuff, but I am lazy I guess and dont think I can commit to something that drastic. 

  I want to write on some of the stuff that happened up in Milwaukee but I dont know where to start.  Was hopping some one would ask about a pic that I posted and I would start with that but no nibbles yet.Anyways now I am just rambling on...

Last Batch of Pics from Milwaukee

I had tons more with my mom in the Hospital but out of respect and to spare you the icks I refraned from posting them.

 

The latest up date on mom is that she will not be going home for a few more days.  They was hoping to go today but she has been having more problems keeping her heart rate stable.  I hate this!  Just when I start to feel relief and have peace that she may just be ok, this happens.  I wish what ever God was going to do that he would hurry up and do it so I don't have to keep wraping my mind around it. .. I just read that and it makes me sound like I think the world revolves around me lol and I know it doesnt. Sigh..  I just give it all over to his hands, He is in control, not me.

I have tons of stories to write about the trip but I will save it for tomorrow.  Enjoy the pics.  Pick your faves and maybe I will write about that one, make it easy on me hey.

Our Trip on The Great River Road

Here is the Pics from our road trip up to Wis.  Mom and John was so excited to take The Great River Road up threw IL to Wis.  We only got lost twice lol.  As you can see there are many intresting stops and sites to see and we had the luxary of taking our time to see what we could.

Josh advised us on starting out in Alton so John could see the Clarks Bridge.  John said it was one of the best things he has ever seen in his life.  I know this is a famous bridge and ppl from all over the Country come just to see it, but living  close to it I guess I take it for granted.  It is Impressive!  After we got off the bridge Mom was looking quick for signs to direct her to The Great River Road and we got side tracked and found our way some how on small side street with this monument to Elijah Lovejoy.  Aparently he is a hero in freeing the salves.  He was a printer/publisher who was out spoken agents it and eventaly was killed because of his views. Notice the Angel has a quill pen in one hand and a horn in the other. Poetic I think. Then we got back to the main drag and ofcourse we drove by Fast Eddies.  I had to take pics of it cuz it is one of the famous land marks of Alton. Cheap food but good.  It was an hour before opening or else we would of stopped for a bite.  Then mom started going SOUTH when she should of gone NORTH and John and I kept telling her she was going in the wrong direction and she got frazzeled lol. But eventaly we got on the right path. After awhile of going good and a few potty stops we some how got off the Great River Road and got on Illoins River Road (there is a differnace).  We bagan wondering why we saw all this tall corn and mom was commenting how tall it was growing and then I got the idea that the river was kinda far off, for being the Great River Road you would think we would follow close to it.  And sure engh we was way off.  So we turned around and followed the map and got very surprised when the road ended and all that was there was a ferry to take us to the other side of the Illinois River.  It was free! Part of Department Of ILL Trapsertation.  It runs 24/7.  And after that we found our way back to The Great River Road.  Our bellies began to rumble some so we started looking out for a place to eat.  We even crossed over into Iowa but the little river town had nothing but KFC. Bla.  So we kept looking and stoped on one of the over looks they have to look at a map. Then we gazed up and saw this very strange building.  It had what looked like the Muslim cresnt moon and a star of David too. Very Strange Indeed. So ofcourse we had to investigate what it was.  After paying $10 for a tour (unguided one) and reading some flyer we got our answer.  A rich exentric fellow by the name of Mr. Metz had built it way back the late 1800 for the hefty price of $9,000! He liked to travel to the mid east and in Pakistan so he had this min. castle built in its style.  There is a bit of a contrvesy of why he named it Villa Kathrine.  Some say after his mother, some say after a lover that never came to live there.  It is an intresting building and I am glad we stopped and took a look.  A MUST SEE if you are ever in or around Quincy ILL.  But still we didnt see anything open as ways of a resturant.  So we swore that no matter what was in the next town we would stop and eat there!

Nauvoo was the next town up the river.  It was just our luck that the only place we could find to stop was MORMAN MECCA.  Ok not Mecca but it might as well of been.  It is a very important site in Morman history and there are monuments all over the place and crowdes of longsleeved/ tie wearing Mormans as far as the eye could see. (NO JOKE)  And guess who was wearing her Grace Family T~Shirt that day?!  Needless to say we looked out of place and got many polite stares.  Wonder if there would of been a riot if I had started passing out tracks? LOL JK  So we found a motel that had a resurant in it and had a good clean caffien free lunch and back on our way.  The storm clouds started to roll in and it started getting late anyways.  So Mom decied she had engh of The Great River Road and took us off to the main highway right up the middle of ILL.  Wouldn't you know it, we drove right into a storm bearing Tornatic Weather.  Sigerns blearing and all!  YOU KNOW how freaked I am about tornados!  I begged mom to pull over somewhere, anywhere so we could take cover but really there was no where to go.  We flipped on the radio and intently listioned as we heard the warnings for each town we had just been threw broadcast.  We seemed to be just infront of it all.  Then the rain started coming down in sheets and we had no choice but to pull over till it let up.  We eventaly got home to Milwaukee Wis or actualy Cudday Wis where Mom and John Live.  It was almost 2:00 a.m.  And that was our great adventure!  Here are some links from the web of some of the stops we made.

Great River Road - Illinois

www.riverroads.com - Your online source for Great River Road and Mississippi R

Road Trip USA :: The Great River Road

AltonWeb // The River Bend - Clark Bridge, Alton, Illinois

monument  ***Fast Eddie's Bon-Air***

Kampsville Ferry  Quincy Illinois Parks  

  Nauvoo Illinois Temple Main      Nauvoo.net

4th Of July Revisited

Here are my pics from the 4th Of July BBQ with our friends from chuch and the tail end of the fire works we got to see from the Rascials BaseBall Feild.

 

Later today or tomorrow I will post the pics from our drive up to Wis. on THE GREAT RIVER ROAD.

I'm Back HOME!

I am finally HOME! In some ways that week went by like a flash of lighting and in other ways it was like living in slow motion. Funny how many things you can cram into one week. And you KNOW I have a ton of pics that I have to share with you all and many stories too.

I guess my last update was Thursday? When I was with my friend.  I spent the night and most of Friday with her and her family. She is one of my oldest friends.  She married Jared, Josh's best friend from Highschool.  I always laughed cuz it seemed Jared would always date my friends.  I had a good time.

Friday I went back up to the Hospital to find my mom in trouble! (figures I spend one day away and all breaks loose) Here Heart Rate was wayyyyyy up, and so was her blood presure. They was trying to get her the meds she needed but all her vains kept collapsing. They tried for over an hour to get one, seems like they used her like a pin cusion! She was on bed rest and couldnt get up for nothing, not even to go to the bathroom. It was so hard to see her sooo weak, and the nurses being so frantic.  I had to take a long walk by myself and was hoping that when I got back they would find a line to get her meds in.  Finaly they just took her down to Radiology to put in a main line so they could get her the meds threw the IV. Then I went home with Marcy.  We didnt get home till late so it was perty much right off to bed. My aunt was to pick me up early so we could spend some time and do some things together.  Marcy had to be at work at 8:45 but didnt wake up till 8:10.  So she was rushing around to get herself and the kids ready to leave.  She asked Gregg (her live in bf and father of the older two girls) to help get the twins dressed. This started a shouting match between the two of them. I dont know if they fight like that all the time infront of the kids but it was not good, I went into the hall and smoked a cig  so I wouldnt be in the middle of it.  Marcy called her daycare and they said they would pick the kids up for her by 9 a.m. So she left them at home with me, Greg had left with out a word. 10 rolls around and no sign of the daycare pick up and my Aunt came ready to pick me up.  So we had to take all 4 kids over to Marcy's work. Her oldest one was throwing the biggest FIT I have ever seen any child make! She wouldnt put on her shoes, I had to pull her out of the apartment and she wouldnt sit in the car. I had tohold her on my lap and restrain her. She screemed the whole way there. I had to hold her so tight cuz she was trying to open the car door! I have bruses on my legs from where she was kicking me.  I think watching her parents fight had something to do with it. So all that wore me out and took up time too. I didnt get to get back to the hospital to say good bye to my mom. My aunt and I did go to my dad's grave site and after that to my other aunt and uncle's house for a quick good bye.  Then it was time for me to get on the train.

The train ride was nice and I got some good pics.  Seems lately I am into the clouds, taking pics of them.  They are so beautiful. I imagin The Lord as he decended into them and how it will be when he comes back in them.  On the train I did get to read all of Revalations and Danial. Been awhile since I could sit and read them threw. My stop over in Chicago wasnt so bad. And NO I did not TALK to anyone lol. That is all anyone told me before I left, dont talk to anyone at the train station.

When I got off the train in Matoon Josh's Mom and Lilly and Sophia was there to meet me. It was so good to see them.  I didnt relize how much I missed them till I saw them. I hugged them and kissed them and didnt want to let them go.

Last night I talked with Marcy to try and get an update on MOM.  She said she had another bad day (Sunday) so she will still be in the hospital for a few days. She said it seemed like when ever they took her off the oxogen her heart rate would shoot way up.  It seemed like everything was going sooo well for mom, and she looked good and now there all these snages in her recovery.  I had peace that she would be OK but that feeling of dread is starting to come back. It is ok either way, I had those important conversations with her and I know what her wishes are and I KNOW that if she was to die, she would be with the LORD.

More Later, with PICS.

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Getting Ready to Go and weekend re-cap

I hope everyone had a wonderful Holiday Weekend!

Mine has been really nice!  Mom got into town like I expected, aournd 6 a.m. Sat.  They checked into the motel room and took a nap and then came over arounrd 2.  I gave her a REALY BIG (((((((((((HUG)))))))))) when I saw her. It felt sooooo Good.  Even grown kids need hugs from thier mommies.   Ofcourse mom came bearing gifts.  John was decluttering thier apartment and brought down 3 rubermate tubs of stuff, with contents from candles to my dad's old stamp collection. Also John slipped in two brand new Third Millinem Bibles. They look nice but I was inspecting them cuz I was not familar with that translation and I found it odd they had a section called A/D and books I didn't reconize, then it dawned on me, OHH They are Catholic Bibles when I saw the Macabees. (John is Russian Orthidox, wonder if that was a hint?) Mom did give me her China and I told her I would just hold it for my sister Marcy, when she gets her a bigger place to live and room to store it.  We already have Josh's mom's China, so I thought that would be fair.  BUT I am keeping the Silver tea set that was Great-GrandmaBea's and other silver mom had.  I told LillyBea she could have GrandmaBea's silver when she gets married. (not that she understood, she is only 4 lol and right away Annie chimed in "What do I get"?) The silver is really dirty but I am afraid to clean it myself after watching The Road Show on PBS. So its on the list of things to get done when we have money. I will take it to a PRO.  So after looking threw all the goodies Mom decided to take me shopping for dinner but ofcourse we made a stop at K-Mart first. We only stopped there to get a game called Skip-Bo, a family favorate game of ours, started by my Grandma.   Anyone play??? lol

But once there mom had to get presents for the grandkids and spoil them.  I had to put my foot down on her getting a 3 ft over stuffed Panda Bear for Sophia but in hindsight I guess it wouldnt of hurt anything, but the thing was huge!  Then we went to the grocry store and got stakes for grilling.  You have to understand there is no such thing as a simple shopping trip with my mom. What should only take an hour takes 3 with her. She mulles over each item and looks threw almost every isle and to top it off her husband was with us and he is just as bad lol.  I can't image how they do thier weekly shopping together and it not taking 5hours. lol (teasing here) So Sat evening we had a night of good food and games.  Sunday we all went to church and it was an awesome service.  I should of took mom up for prayer when it was offered but I was shy I guess and didn't know if she would feel comfortable with that.  She did say they enjoyed the music very much. When we got home we planned out our route up to Milwaukee. They want to take the Great River Road up threw ILL to Wis. It is suposed to be really perty and I will take bunches of pics. Then at 6 we went over to our friends house for the BBQ.  Our friends just got a pool so Ofcourse I had to wear my sutit and spend most that time with the kids in the pool.  We did get floaties and rings for the girls and they are swiming like they are almost pros themself. On that list is swimming lessions for all our kids.  Then we went to go see the BIG Fire Works at the baseball satium here in O'Fallon.  Some knows some one who works there and said they could get us in to watch it from the blechers. But after parking and walking we got there just as the end was happening. I did get some nice pics and I will post them when I get back.  I was worn out after we got home and didn't even pack like I had planned. And OFCOURSE I had to sneek on here to post an entry before I left.  So I am off to do that.  Mom wants to leave my house by 8 a.m. (its almost 7 now) but I am thinking we wont get out of here till 10 (LMBO). I did turn off all my alerts so my mail box isnt flooded when I get back, but I did leave on my comment alerts so I can hear your coments read to me by ABP.  I will be posting audio entries from the Road " )

Friday all ready?!

And It's Friday already! awwk!  Where did this week go?  I have tons to do today to get ready for this weekend and next week still.  My mom is coming in, not sure if it will late tonight or tomorrow morning.  Knowing her tomorrow morning.  Oh she says she will leave right after she gets off of work today, and I am sure she has plans to be ready, but knowing her she will not leave her house till 8:00 p.m.  It is about a 7-8 hour drive depending on stops and speed and trafic.  She will probly stop over to sleep at 12-1 pm (if she makes it that long) So she will probly find her way to my house around 10 or so in the morning at my house. lol  This is how it usally works with her.  Josh and I are in the mists of an argument.  He wants to take our older two kids to his Dad's house tonight.  He claims that was the org plan?  Um, lets back track here, reading in my journal I have always been under the impression the kids would go MONDAY, after my mom's visit and after we leave.  Why take them over there tonight? Doesn't he think my mom wants to visit with her grandchildren too???  He says I stomp my feet like a little kid when I dont get my way, well he is acting like that right now.  What is the big deal? I dont know?  All I know is my kids are looking forward to my mom's visit, looking forward to the 4th of July BBQ we plan on going to at our friends from church house.  Josh already has plans on going to his dad's Monday anyways for another BBQ.  I think he is confused, and that maybe working out in the sun this week has half fried his brain.

I have my notes from Wednesday but they are not all typed out yet.  I am running out of time here but I will make an effort to get them up on my other journal soon.  I instructed Josh he hassssssss to go to church for me Wed and take DETAILD notes for me and to get a tape of the serman.

All this talk about 1st year anv in J~Land is really cool.  I sent in my first journal entry last night.  I got stuck reading threw months of my journal from the start lol.  Wow, that charter limit thing was a downer huh!  So glad we have had that upgrade.  Yet some of the short entries are simple and too the point.  It is neat to go back and read and see what was going on and how I have grown. My first entry was Aug. 25th, 2003.

I am sure I will get in one more entry before I leave Mondayand I will do audio updates while I am gone.

Please keep me in prayer over this weekend as I visit with my mom and oppertuinties come up to talk with her about things that need to be talked about. That the Holy Spirit would operate in each sitation.