Answering a question

I have tried to privetly e-mail two comments made in my journal recently but the screen names always turn up unknown.  I really want this person to hear what I have to say and have been praying they would contcact me again.  I only answer openly because I know they read my journal and since I can not e-mail them I am going to answer here.  Please anyone, feel free to e-mail me any time or IM if you see me online.   In a message dated 2/9/2005 9:06:15 A.M. Central Standard Time, AOLAlerts writes:

A comment has been posted to the Journal:
Hunybea's Open Journal
Silent No More Gathering at The Arch St. Louis, MO.
Comment from: carolinafan618
"this is awesome that you can talk about this... I am still in the closet about what I did almost 20 years ago... I am debating on going to the class at church forgiven and set free but wonder what others will think of me or whatnot..In Sunday school there was a discussion about the sanctity of human life and the teacher said I do not know how a woman could live with herself after having abortion... That hurt... As you said when you have it done you do not think of the future.. how old the child would be? I had a miscarriage several years ago and had a very hard time with that and thoughts of the abortion made it hard.. In sunday school class I wanted to get up and leave just hard to listen too but i toughed it out..One of the pastors wife read scriptures from the bible about it and then offered if needed to talk to her to get literature... I couldnt do it.. This week in the bulletin there is a thing offering the class..... I know in my heart it would be good for me to go too,but the courage isnt there.. Any idea suggestions? I am afraid what others would think but yet they would be in the same boat as me. Thanks for listening
"

I had a comment in a previous entry similar to yours.. was it you?  I tried to e-mail the screen name in the comment but it was an unknown member.  I was praying that person would contact me again.  I will enclose that e-mail for you to read.  I can see how you would of been upset with what that teacher had said, she just lacks understanding and compassion.  Many people do.  Before I was public about it one of my best friends had made a comment about the excuses people use to get an abortion, one being they could never carry a baby to term and then give it up for adoption and she scoffed.  That was when I piped up.. I had an abortion and that is exactly what I told myself.  She was visibly hurt that she had just laughed about it and was judging and here I was hurting over it.  The truth always opens eyes and brings understanding.  Here is what I wrote that person who had commented before.   

.  Let me say I am proud of you for asking questions and reading the list and I do not judge you.  Do not be fearful of what others are going to think dear one.  In all likelihood the person they listed to contact about the study has had an abortion also and has gone threw the study, that is why she feels able to be open about it.  Fear is not from God, but from Satan.  He doesn't want you to find healing, he wants  to keep you in a dark place.  If you do not feel comfortable enough to do the study with people you know from church go contact one of the Pregnancy Recourse Centers in your area and tell them you are post abortive and want to do this study.  That is where I went for this study.

  Here is also a webpage that lists a lot of recourses you can use and numbers to call that can help you find a place to do a study similar to the one being offered at your church. http://www.clothedwithjoy.org/page6.html  But what ever you do, please seek some help.  I never realized how deeply I was effected and how certain patters where established in my life because of my abortion.  It is a hurt we try and stuff down deep but it surfaces in many ways we may not expect.  Believe me when I say this is a good thing to do for yourself and will help you draw closer to God too.   If I can be of any help feel free to e-mail or IM me.   Much Love, Mary