Phil wrapped his arms around Hannah, wanting to protect her from the unseen force she seemed to be running from. He knew all about bad dreams and nightmares or as he was diagnosed as having, night terrors. He has been plagued by them ever since he was a child, right after his mother’s death but it is also a source for much of his lyrics. “Calm down. I am right here. It is over now. You are safe.” he said trying to settle the shivering girl in his arms.
Hannah burrowed her face into Phil’s chest, trying to hide the tears that flowed without her permission. She still felt the fear that rose up in her threw out the nightmare but the images of the dream started to fade into a haze and she was beginning to feel like a foolish kid and embarrassed. Phil held her and let her calm in his embrace. He stroked her golden blond hair as they stood there for a few seconds of silence.
Hannah’s heart stated to come back down to a normal steady pace and the emotions that the dream hand invoked drained away. She pulled back from Phil’s chest and wiped her eyes. “I am sorry. You must think I am a baby but I can’t remember the last time I had a nightmare. This one was crazy from what I now remember.” she said blushing.
Phil gave her a half cocked smile with thoughts of how cute she was for being embarrassed about something she had no control over. He gave her a deeper hug and holding her close whispered in her ear, “No. No sweet thing. I am just glad I was here to hold you when it was over. Don’t feel silly because of having a nightmare. Dreams are there for a purpose I think, to tell us something. Let’s sit over here on the bed and you can tell me about it.”
Hannah looked up into Phil’s green eyes and then over to the bed. They had purposely avoided the bed since they came to his room. She knew that she should keep with that thinking lest she be tempted to loose that control. Also, she did not want to go into detail about the dream that was quickly fading behind a veil of fuzz. “No, I rather not talk about it. I am awake and you are still here. That is all the comfort that I need. Besides, what time is it! You were supposed to wake me up!” she said as she walked over to the large patio window and took in the bright morning sun.
Phil understood that she wanted to keep her dream private. He hardly talks about his own. Why would he expect anyone else to tell him of theirs? He gazed over at the clock on the media cabinet. “It is still early morning. Only 8:00.”
Hannah groaned softly with disappointment. She knew that she should leave and her time with Phil was over. It was time for her to go home or to Becka’s as she promised. Last night was like a wild ride and today was time to pay for the cost of the rollercoaster ticket. Phil walked up behind her as she gazed at the sparse Sunday morning Down Town St. Louis traffic. He put his hands on her shoulders and gently massaged them and as if he read her thoughts he said, “Don’t go yet. Stay a little longer.”
Hannah reached a crossed her chest and up to where Phil’s right hand was on her shoulder and held it with a squeeze. She whispered, “I wish I didn’t have to but I can’t expect my friend to cover for me all day as well.” Hannah knew she had to spend some time with Becka as ways of pay back for going along with her lie to her parents. Oh, her parents. They would kill her if they knew half of what she had been up to. But they would never believe their obedient little girl was out all night parting with a rock star, even if she had told them.
Phil wanted to be selfish and lock Hannah away all day with him in his room. It has been a long time since he had to answer to anybody for his actions or whereabouts. Even when he was a teenager he pretty much had freedom to do as he wished. It is hard for him to understand that Hannah needed to be covered for or that she had to go anywhere that she didn’t want to. He asked in a sweet little boy tone, “Why don’t you call and see. Try and get away for the day. Please, for me? I am only going to be in town for a week.”
Hannah was torn again by the two voices in her head. One said to do the right thing and go home. The other new rebellious one exclaims to her this is her time and to go with the flow! It tells her to give Phil what ever he wants. It was the preverbal struggle between right and wrong. Most of her life doing what was right always had won out and it was hard for her to got ageist her conscious now. But one phrase from her dream still drifted in her awaking mind, “you can have it all”. Phil was doing his best to feed the other voice by stroking her shoulders and her neck. He smoothly twirls her around and gives her a slow kiss. It was all the motivation to stay that Hannah needed.
No comments:
Post a Comment