Saturday, August 11, 2007

I'm A Quitter : P

The last two weeks have been a blur and feels like a month.  I did get a J O B.  For about two weeks lol.  I worked for a cleaning service... a maid.  I didn't mind the work and found it ironic.. I hate cleaning yet that is the job I landed.  The houses were beautiful and not really dirty, just in need of routine cleaning.  But still it was Hard work, my body is all in knots and aching.  I am realizing I am not as young as I used to be lol.  What sucked most about the job was where I was being sent and the gas it was taking. 
 I don't expect you to understand Saint Louis geography and it's surrounding areas but I live in Lincoln County, the office was in St Peters and then some of these houses she was sending me to was in Creve Core and Chesterfield.  The straw that broke my back was when she sent me to Clayton as the last job of the day.. I didn't get out of that house till almost 7 and didn't get home till about 8 p.m.  I made $9 an hour but she didn't pay for the mileage, just the drive time.  She assured me that was only while I was on probation and once I was permeant I would make 50% of the house and that can average $15 an hour and make up for the gas.  But Thursday I was D O N E done.  My body ached, my heart was hurting from the guilt of spending so much time away from my family and the engine light came on the Van.. plus the heat!  I may have justified the gas issue so that I could quit.  Yessss I am a quitter!  BUT I so tried, really I did.  I prayed everyday as I was scrubbing toilets and trusting there was a purpose for me being where I was and I was trying not to covet and drool over what I cannot have. I tried to stay positive, chipper, and go the extra mile but I was starting to wear thin. It probably didn't help that we had Summer Adventure all week at church and I was up there helping right after work each night and I wasn't getting proper sleep.   Oh well.. all practice for the next job.  At least I did get two pay checks under my belt and that will help some.  Back again to the
J O B search (YUCK)
It felt sooooooo good to sleep in Friday.  I didn't do it on purpose but I guess my body was exhausted.  And then I had Josh give me a deep body massage.  That helped loosen me up but I could use about 5 more of those and then I would finally get all these muscles to stop being so sore.  Now I have a ton of things to catch up on.. My own house work and earns to run and getting the kids ready for school.  Josh has been home for a week and is getting ready to head out again Sunday.  So much going on all at once.  I guess I just need a good day of rest to recharge and refocus.  No wonder people don't have time anymore to fellowship and just take time to care for others, we are too busy with our own stuff to make ourselves available for other's needs.  I don't like that.. and I DONT want to turn into that.