Thursday, June 30, 2005

Testimony entered in to the Senate, Abortion and the Breast Cancer Link and other harmful effects

I recomend clicking the link at the bottom and reading it in full but here is some highlights.

US Senate Committee Hears Testimony on Abortion Cancer Links

WASHINGTON, June 30, 2005 ( - On June 23, US Senator Sam Brownback held a subcommittee hearing examining “The Consequences of Roe v. Wade and Doe v. Bolton.” Testimony focused on the social and medical harms of abortion including the significant statistical link between abortion and incidence of breast and other forms of cancer.
Teresa Stanton Collett, a Professor of Law at the University of St. Thomas School of Law in Minneapolis, testified that Roe and Doe “have significantly undermined the well being of women and children in the United States, as well as seriously damaged the political fabric of American civil society.”
Collett, who has worked with the legal system in Texas to find ways of implementing parental consent laws, criticized the social damage done to women and the women’s movement by abortion. She said that at the time the abortion laws were struck down, women had already made huge progress towards true equality in society, but “not by means of denying their capacity to conceive and bear children.”
Collett said that abortion has changed the landscape for women, making sterility the new model of success. “Rather than furthering these achievements while accommodating the unique maternal capacity of women, Roe and Doe adopted the sterile ‘male model’ of society effectively forcing women to conform to ideal of childlessness.”
Collett then listed the medical harms of abortion, including higher incidents of three different forms of cancer - breast, ovarian and endometrial. She explained that the increase in the hormone estrogen, a known carcinogen, is the culprit and that the early termination of pregnancy, either deliberately by abortion or from miscarriage, causes estrogen to remain in the body.
She cited the landmark World Health Organization study in 1970 by Harvard researchers, Brian MacMahon and his colleagues, who firmly established in the medical literature that having an early first birth is especially critical if women are to prevent breast cancer. Childbirth, said Collett, reduces risk of this disease by causing malignant and pre malignant cells to be shed from the inner lining. The more children a woman has, the lower her risk is for endometrial cancer and breast cancer.
Others giving testimony included Dr. Bernard Nathanson, who again debunked the common myths that ‘thousands of women died from back alley abortions before it was legalized.’
Dr. Joel Brind who has traced the correlation between breast cancer and abortion, dismissed “safe abortion” mythology.
He presented an affidavit showing that women delaying the birth of a first child for only one year increase the risk of dying from breast cancer to an extent that is ten times greater than the risk of dying in childbirth.
Read Teresa Stanton Collett’s testimony:

Fighting Discouragement.. Prayer and Watchmen Radio

Tonight (Wednesday) I finally got to go to a Wed night service at church.  It seems like it has been forever but with the home buying classes all done now I can start going back to church in the middle of the week.  It seems like (as always) the message was timely for me. 

The topic was Defeating Discouragement, using Nehemiah and the rebuilding of the wall in Jerusalem as an illustration.  I thought it would be beneficial to post my notes here.. for me and for anyone else who may need it.. because let's face it.. we all feel discouraged now and then.  


What causes it? Outside and internal influences:  

Ridicule.. by those around you or even you yourself.

Doubt Sarcastic.. from those around you

Repression.. Fear

Being tiered physically and mentally.. fatigue.

Frustration... anxiety

Pessimistic.. negative ppl around you  

Cures for Discouragement  

Ask God for help!!

Prayer before proceeding

Don't talk back or feed into those being negative around you.. Talk to God instead

Press on.. Don't stop, keep going

Reorganize your priorities, change your approach.

Remember who God is!!

Stay focused on the Lord and NOT on the situation.

Get good rest so you can be refreshed for the next day and the next task.  

I asked for some scriptures to read when we are feeling discouragement and I was promised to have those gotten to me by Sunday.. I'll repost them here.  


  Also tonight the prayer group I head up met for a chat time in the group's chat room(pubg400680284846829chat Wednesdaynights at 10p.m. Central time ).  We prayed and fellowship.  We are going to try and make this a weekly event for our group but as always anyone who needs prayer is free to join in or even just post requests at Prayer In Jesus Name.   

Also I wanted to point youall to listen to the last week's Watchmen Radio's program posted on Count Down USA or click here.  Our very own Hunter from Jesus Is Coming In This Generation can be heard reading the news of the week.  He has a very sweet voice and it was neat to get toput a voice behind the entries he posts with such passion.  I just started looking threw the site but it seems to be a very informative End Times ministry and a short wave radio is going on my wish list lol. I also have put in my reminders to listen every Friday night 10 p.m. Est. to hear the show Watchmen Radio live online.  Check it out!

Monday, June 27, 2005

Irronic.. and basicly.. nothing was resolved with these ruling..

AOL NEWS: "WASHINGTON (June 27) - The Supreme Court struggled in a pair of 5-4 rulings Monday to define how much blending of church and state is constitutionally permissible, allowing the Ten Commandments to be displayed outside the Texas state Capitol but not inside Kentucky courthouses.

In its first rulings on the issue in a quarter-century, the high court said that displays of the Ten Commandments on government property are not inherently unconstitutional. But each exhibit demands scrutiny to determine whether it amounts to a governmental promotion of religion, the court said in a case involving Kentucky courthouse exhibits."

Moses on the rear facade of the U.S. Supreme Court

Moses with the Ten Commandments inside the Supreme Court's courtroom

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Cheap fun and I am reminded again of how Blessed I am..

After I picked the kids up from their over nighter we elected to go to Grant's Farm.  If you ever visit Saint Louis and are looking for something cheap to do with the family, check out Grant's Farm.  You only have to pay $6 for parking and admission is free.

We had a lot of fun, even if it was a really hot day.  We cooled off in the shade alot and they did have a water sprayer for the kids to play in (see pics..too cute).  In the park you basically take a tram tour.  The animals are plenty and they can hide or as did the Buffalo, get really close up.  Sophia did get scared when one of the Buffalo got really close and she about had a fit.  Other than that it was all excitement and good times.  At the end of our tour we stopped off at the gift shop and picked up post cards.  I suggested to the kids they could send them to Uncle Tommy.. we are long over due in the letter writing department.  Ohh and enjoy the pics, Zane took most of them.  He is a budding photographer and director.  He kept asking the staff if they would pose for a picture and most where happy to for him.

On the way into the park I did notice a women standing around as if waiting for a ride.  She had luggage and bags.  I thought it was odd and kept in mind Monica's story about a caller she had gotten at work the other day.  LOL I projected the story I read in Mon's journal to be this women's story and felt sad for her as I parked.  But once we were in the park I forgot all about her until we were leaving.  The women was still there, only a little bit further down the way at the corner.  As my van approached her I rolled down my window and when we were at the stop light I yelled out to her if she needed a ride.  She jogged over to me leaving her bags where they were (she had a lot of them).  Where you heading she asked, as she scanned the inside of my van.  I told her my general direction and she said, Oh. Well you have kids and I have alot of stuff so I don't want to impose but do you have a few bucks for a cold drink?  I realized after a survey of how beat up her bags were and her slightly dirty cloths that she was a street person.  I wish she would of excepted my offer for a ride, so I could hear her realstory and maybe help in some small way but the light was starting to change and I didn't have my wallet handy.  I offered her my unopened diet soda instead but again she said no thanks, she doesn't like soda. Then there was a honk of a horn from the car behind me and the conversation was over just like that.

The kids asked as we drove away why that lady was just standing there with all her stuff?  I told them probably because she had no where to go, she lived on the street.  I suggest we pray for this women, for protection and for God's care over her.  I am asking the same of you all too.  Pray for this women.

I was lost in thought on the way home.  Thinking how easily that women could of been me if I had taken a turn here or there instead of  making the choices I did make.  She made me think of certain friends who I know may be on the street now, instead of having families and homes.  The Bible says sometimes we entertain angels unaware and that is why we should welcome in strangers.. was this women an angel sent to remind me yet again how blessed I am?  My mind turned what would I said to this women and do with her if she had accepted my offer of a ride.  Would I , could I of taken her home?  Ya, I do sound like a sucker huh.  LOL but I wouldn't of only because my house is in utter chaos right now and I would of been too embarrassed by the mess.  Silly I know.  My mind was searching to think of what homeless shelters I knew of and where they were, but none were coming up.  You know I always look at underpasses for people sleeping or  hanging out, with the idea if I had extra on hand I could give it over to them, but I never do see anyone.  And really that is likely a claque about homeless people and underpasses.  I know there is a section by the river where some gather and in the past some from church have taken food and blankets and clothes down there.  Women are generally asked not to come for safety but I think I would like to go just once.  Sometimes we fear things just because we are told to, and it holds us back from doing what God is asking.

Anyway I am rambling now lol.  It was a good day, and I am blessed.  Hope you all can count your blessings too and be thankful.

Is there a better site then Map Quest??

Almost time to go get my children from their cousin's house.  So what did I do to take advantage of a very very rare night of being kidless AND husbandless???? NOTHING!!  The house was sooooooo quiet it was almost painful.  I would of gone out but I had no one to go out with and I am not the type of person that goes to a movie or goes bowling alone.

I played on the computer until about 2 a.m. (tisk tisk) When I finally got all caught up with journal reading and the chat rooms seemed to be too blah I put my away message on, turned off all the lights, locked the doors and went into my lonely bed.  I was flipping threw 500 channels with nothing on.  I turned down the tv and just started to hug Josh's pillow.. and smell it.  Yes I said smell it.  I have come to the conclusion that I can never live single (and wouldn't want to if I could) and my children is what color's my world.  I will appreciate them all the more and maybe that is why God gave me this alone time, so I could see exactly how good I have it.

I was deep in these thoughts, missing my husband and wishing I could talk to him when the phone rang.  I jumped out of bed and ran to the phone hoping that maybe my husband sensed how lonely I was and it was him calling me.  To my surprise it was my friend Amy asking if I was up. LOL ya I was up, kinda.

She was somewhere near Mt. Vernon, IL on her way to Panama City, FL.  Her son is in a little league baseball tournament down there and she thought the directions she got were screwy and wanted me to see if I could find some better ones off the net (because I am the Internet Queen around here don't you know)  So I went to the same place she got her directions from, Mapquest.  I was there earlier today getting directions to my husband's cousin's house and I can testify they can give you screwy almost too detailed directions that can make it confusing.  I looked and looked for a better site but found nothing.  I told her to get a map from a gas station and plot her trip on it, that will make her feel more confidant.  She claims she doesn't know how to read a map.  I wonder how that is possible, doesn't everyone take geography in school, and I know she was a good student.  We lamented how we wish I was there to help her on her journey, it would of made a fun trip, and how Josh would be laughing his butt off when he heard that SHE called me for directions.  He seems to think I am the worst when it comes to giving and taking directions.

So Amy and I talked for about an hour or so and then I told her I had to go to bed, call me when you get there.  I drifted off to sleep a bit less lonely.  I did set my alarm for 8:00 because I was going to go to church.  But when my eyes fluttered open at 10:45 I knew that wasn't going to happen so I drifted back to deep sleep.  Around 12:00 the phone woke me up with my husband's sweet voice on the other end.

He is still not sure how long he is going to be out of town but I pray that it will either be cut short or my loneliness will subside.  Maybe after I go and get the kids we will go and do something special?

Saturday, June 25, 2005

And even if you did make a list.. would you try to do everything on it?

Thought for Today

"When it comes time to die...make sure all you got to do is die." - Jim Elliot


Thanks Chris from the Laugh and Lift mailing list.

Deep thoughts, that I know I should explore with some witty commentary.  But.. I have to get the kids ready for an overnighter and hopefully get to have a girls night out with a friend (since Josh isn't here to share this kidless night) And I also have to boil 3 dozen eggs to make deviled eggs for a pot luck dinner after church tomorrow.

What do you have to do or would like to do before you die? Start a list and share.. I will make one soon. ohh that may make a good Saturday Six question.. I'll have to send it into Pat lol.

Time for the 6!!!

Saturday Six time.. when was the last time I did this??!! Who ever coined the saying Lazy Days Of Summer must not of had 4 children to chase after lol.

Ok you should know the drill by now. Pat posts six questions, we answer and leave a link in his comment section with our answers.

1. Yesterday, I linked to the journal "Mall Of America," a collection of photos from shopping malls of the 1960s and 1970s.  What store do you associate most with your childhood in terms of happy memories and why?  Is the store still around? I really had to think on this one.  Remember I hate shopping for the most part and thinking about it now it may stem from my childhood. (what doesn't?) I hated shopping with my mom when she brought my siblings with, yes Marcy you were a big fat BRAT in the stores LOL.  I remember the time we went to Shop-Ko (sp?) school shopping and she threw the biggest fit in the store.  Everyone was looking at my poor mom with looks of pitty.  If my kids act like that I take them out to the car and give them a big smack (jk.. they don't act like that, they know better)  But I would have to say my favorite childhood store from my memories is BenFranklin's Nickel and Dime.  It was off the main drag in the small down we lived in and you could always find something interesting in there. Last I was up there for a visit it had been changed into a chain store.  More proof the world is going to hell n a hand basket.

2. What song makes you the most emotional and why? It doesn't make me cry every time I hear it but it does provoke deep emotions.  I have written about this song and why it has been so important in my life many times.. so I will just link to some of those if you really need an explanation.. Jesus Lover Of My Soul.  Click here for a journal post.. and hereif you have time to read my long webpage about who I used to be.

3. Take the
quiz:  What year were you born under, and what year should you have been born under?

You Were Actually Born Under: Popular and crafty, you are a master at the art of seduction. You are intelligent and intuitive - and make a savvy businessperson. You live life to the fullest, even if it means maxing out your credit cards. Many people are secretly (and hopelessly) in love with you. You are most compatible with a Rooster or Ox. You Should Have Been Born Under: You are totally loyal, faithful, and honest. However, you don't trust others to be as ethical as you are! Straight forward and direct, you really aren't one for small talk. You are a great listener - and an agreeable companion when you're in a good mood! You are most compatible with a Tiger or Horse.   4. What time do you typically wake up each day?  What is the latest you're normally able to sleep?  How many hours of sleep do you get in an average night? Around 8-8:30, since it is summer.  If I am lucky and don't mind the kids trashing the house I can sleep till 10 but if I was kidless, depending on how late I stayed up I could sleep to 11 easily.  Normally, because I am in the bad habit of being a night owl I get about 7 hours or so of sleep.  Nap time is important around here lol.

5. What frightens you the most about getting older? I am almost 30.  I have come to terms that I can not be a teenager for ever.  There is a time and season for everythingin our life and I now can say I look forward to the milestones of life.  What I fear most is seeing everyone I love die around me.  I don't want to be the first to go, but NOT the last either LOL

Debi:  If you found the house of your dreams, right price, then discovered that a murder or suicide had taken place in the house, would you still consider buying the house? Ohh a good question, since we are house hunting right now.  I do think certain spirits or demons can attach themselves to places and things but should I let that put me in fear?? NO!  I think I would have to pray about it first and if I felt God was giving us the OK, I would move in but prepare myself for some spiritual warfare.

Friday, June 24, 2005

Seeing Red.. *beware this is prob too much info*

How just perfect that I am watching Stephen King's Carry tonight???  Refrance the chant "Plug It UP" from that movie to see why.

LOL sorry, I have said before who knows what I will put in here on any given day.  And hey.. this helps me keep track sometimes.

A reminder to stay prepared for the worst...

We had an appointment yesterday out at one of the builders and with a financing company.  Sadly the one house we wanted the lot for it was sold so that knocks that one out.  We could wait for another lot to become available but that one would have a bigger lot premium on it. LMBO.. and they were still trying to get us into that Mansion of a house.  Josh said sure if I went back to work.. HA! NOT, what would he have me do.. dance on a pole? jk  So basically we elimited that builder because they didn't have the cheaper house we wanted available.  So we drove by two of the other builders we liked and narrowed it down to two houses.  One smaller more bland reasonable house with a small standard master bath, but it would have a walk out basement and vaulted celing and a nice big lot.  The other one has all the features we liked from the one builder and most of their extras were standard making them reasonable too and they had the master bath that I loved.  Only on that one the lot we realy realy realy want has a hold on it untill July 3.  If they don't sign by then we can if we have the financing (and it looks like we will).  So I put a deposit on the smaller house's lot just incase we don't get that one.

On our way home Josh and I were talking about him leaving and what needed to be done while he was gone.  He started commenting how the tire felt wobbly and it shouldn't because he Just got it changed.  He was telling me how I needed to call on it and then it started getting worse.  Just as I was about to suggest us pull over to look at it.. the back tire of the van's tread came off!!!  Thankfully we did not crash (I was calling out to Jesus the whole time!)  We had to wait for a  tow and for a friend to pick us up.  So having to replace the tire dipped into what I wanted to spend this week plus Josh had to get gas and necessities for him going out of town for his job (but he gets reimbursed later).

I must say the house just doesn't seem right with out him here.  He hasn't even been gone a day yet and I miss him madly deeply.  Ya that may sound corny.. but hey he is my best friend too, not just my husband.

So lesson of the post... always keep a spare.. be it a tire or a lot for your house that you want to build.  And plan to budget for those things!!  And hold close your loved ones while you can, because they are something you can not replace or keep a spare for.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Be A Part Of An MIT Study about Weblogs...

Take the MIT Weblog Survey  If you have a blog/journal.. weblog..Click the pic to find out all about it.  It is fun and painless.. I promise!

Doors close but windows open? Maybe...

WHAAAAAHOOOOOOOOO! Tonight was the last class with the Grant Lady. Can I get a yaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!  Ok and that is about all the enthusiasm you will get from me for the rest of the post lol.  She may give us our certificate for completing the classes but gave us a written review that I must say was not all glowing.  She said we need to get control of our spending a bit more, especially on gas station trips (so we buy a soda here and there and Josh occasionally gets a lunch, it's not like we are really dropping THAT much money) and since we had overdraft charges in one of the bank statements we gave her that we should wait 3 months with no charges before looking for a house.  Gurrr.. we explained those to her.. how our bank sucks with their funds availably policy and we missed figured when a deposit was available (doesn't help when our bank did it AGAIN to us over this weekend... thinking of going back to the credit union).  While I am thankful that we were able to deal with this process and get info, since we are not going to be using this particular grant program and I feel like maybe Grant Lady is somewhat judgmental, I take what she said with a grain.  But another blow at the class was they had another program's grant lady come in to talk to us.. one that we had planned on using and listening to their guide lines it will be 6 months before we can use them.  Their rule is you can not have ANY collections on your credit report.  Josh has two very small ones that we planned on taking care of this month but it was said even so they would want to wait six months for it to come off the report.  So, so much for that. BUTTTT.. there is one more grant or loan program we can get (bet you didn't know there was all this free money out there) that we may qualify for and they give more money than this program but we have to go threw an approved lender first to see if we qualify.. appointment for that is already set up for tomorrow.  So we will see.  At worst we have to wait six more months to buy a home (can you feel me stomping my feet nooo now! like my 4yrd?)

But wait there is more.. Josh talked to his mom and she has decided to take a job back in Vegas and not move in with us as planned.  She will be making triple of what she makes now and said she feels really bad and would be willing to send us money to help us.  But that wasn't the point of her moving in with us and thankful we hadn't hinged her money on helping us get a house in the first place.  We saw it more of us helping her and wanting her to stay close to us, being there as the grand kids grow up. Really her moving in with us was what prompted this new housing search in the first place. So we are kinda teary eyed over that.  Josh is mourning that his mommy will never live in our area again.  She has plans to move at the end of July.  So that was that.  I must say I am disappointed.  I was looking forward to her being something of a relief now and than with the kids, and her teaching me how to cook and sew better and I knew how happy Josh was going to be with his mom so close.  But that is a bit less stress too.  Still it sucks.

And ONE more big piece of news.  For a week now Josh has been sitting work wise.  It is just crazy.. this is the mid. of June, he should be working over time not sitting and waiting for work to be available, plus his superintendent KNOWS we are looking to buy a house and need all the money we can get.  So he has been looking for other shops that are hiring and found one that has work for the next 10-15 days... OUT OF TOWN!  Some where in KY.  Not sure where in KY Lori and Jess or for sure you know I would be driving down with him to pay you all a visit LOL.  But we just found this out today that he is going out of town Friday morning so I am scrambling to get him ready.  He hasn't gone out of town for work since last summer, and that sucked too.  But we knew this was part of his job when he signed up to be a Union Painter so I can't do too much pouting over it.  Work is Work.

With Josh being out of town this weekend that puts an end to the romantic kid free Saturday night I had planned.  All four of our kids were invited to sleep over at Josh's cousin's for this Saturday night. So I am hopefully going to go out with the friend who has been watching the kids these last 3 Wed nights so we could go to the classes.  Don't know what we can possibly do lol but I am sure we can think of something.

So as you can see, some doors may have been closed for us buying a house but maybe some windows are opening.  I just wish I knew for sure what God had planned so I wouldn't get my hopes up but I know how ever things work out it will all be for the best and he will bless us.

Monday, June 20, 2005

Doing our home work..

Only One more home buying class to go and then we will be able to officially start the home buying process.  So I was doing this week's home work.. setting a budget.. yuck!  But you know me.. I searched out many web pages with budgeting tools to help me make this task some what easier (cuz I suck at math) and more fun.  Found a GREAT calculator at a site called MoneyAdvise.  With this one you can do your current budget and your projected planned budget side by side.  Thought it would be interesting to see how our budget would work with Josh's soon to be raise and the extra expenses we will need with a new house and what our planned mortgage payment will be.  I must say on paper.. we look pretty GOOD!! But let's face it we don't live on paper and in real life I don't see us having as much left over as the budget on paper says we should.  So I must.. I mean WE must start to examine how we really spend and see if we can really feel that left over money and put more of it away.  But at least I got our homework done, early!!


We had a nice Sunday.  After church we went and visited two more builders and models and then Josh and I sat up most of the night going over the floor plans of allllllllll the builders we have seen and talking about all the pro's and con's of each one.  Exhausting work!!  And yes I about went into tears again because I really feel funny about buying my own house still.. like I don't deserve it and how do we tell the difference between our Pride and Flesh and Deserved Blessings from the Lord. I am afraid to let myself want more than I am used to. Josh said something so sweet.. I had to jump on him after he said it and cover him in kisses.. " I want to give YOU the best house, one that you LOVE, because you DO deserve it!"  Say it with me.. "What a man, what mighty mighty good man.. yes he is!" LOL


So we have 4 floor plans and 3 builders narrowed down and have resigned not to look anymore lol.  And promised to let it all rest for a few days and not talk about it to nauseam.  Tomorrow our friend from church who is a realtor has agreed to sit down with us so we promised each other we will stay off the subject till then.


Tonight is the first night for 3 of the kids to go to VBS. This will be Lilly's first year.. I can hardly believe it.. she is getting so big so fast.  So I have to hurry and make dinner and get them there.


Micah 6:8: He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God

Sunday, June 19, 2005


Thought for Today

"Parents, what are your children learning from your worship? Do they see the same excitement as when you go to a basketball game? Do they see you prepare for worship as you do for a vacation? Do they see you hungry to arrive, seeking the face of the Father? Or do they see you content to leave the way you came?.....They are watching. Believe me. They are watching." - Max Lucado

The Lift

Two Father's Day Devotionals

A Praying Father
(By Henry Bosch)
(Provided by Our Daily Bread, RBC Ministries, 6-15-03 devotional)

"Hear my prayer, O Lord, give ear to my supplications! In Your faithfulness answer me." - Psalm 143:1

A minister concluded his sermon one Sunday by saying, "If there's someone here who wants help in getting to know God, and you would like me to pray for you, please raise your hand." A young man stood up and said, "Please pray for me, sir. The burden of my sin is too heavy to bear."

After the service the minister talked with the man and led him to faith in Jesus. The young man had been wandering around the country for 8 years without contacting his parents, so he decided to write to them and tell them about the change in his life.

Several days later, a reply came from his mother: "My dear son, you must have accepted Jesus Christ at the same hour your father went home to heaven. He had been sick for a long time, and that day he was very restless. He tossed from side to side on his bed, crying out, 'Lord, please save my poor, wandering boy.' I'm sure that one of the reasons you became a Christian was Dad's unceasing intercession."

A praying father will "ask," "seek," and "knock" in behalf of his children, persistently trusting his wise heavenly Father to do what is best (Matthew 7:7-11).

Let's thank God today for faithful fathers who never stop praying for their children.

"We thank You, Lord, for fathers true
Who always spoke to us of You;
Their great concern and tender care
Assured us of their constant prayer."

A praying father reflects the love of our heavenly Father.

Dad's Hat
(By Dave Branon)
(Provided by Our Daily Bread, RBC Ministries, 6-19-05 devotional)

Amid the celebration, there was tragedy. It was the opening ceremonies of the 1992 summer Olympic Games in Barcelona. One by one the teams entered the stadium and paraded around the track to the cheers of 65,000 people. But in one section of Olympic Stadium, shock and sadness fell as Peter Karnaugh, father of United States swimmer Ron Karnaugh, was stricken with a fatal heart attack.

Five days later, Ron showed up for his race wearing his dad's hat, which he carefully set aside before his competition began. Why the hat? It was the swimmer's tribute to his dad, whom he described as "my best friend." The hat was one his dad had worn when they went fishing and did other things together. Wearing the hat was Ron's way of honoring his dad for standing beside him, encouraging him, and guiding him. When Ron dove into the water, he did so without his dad's presence but inspired by his memory.

On this Father's Day, there are many ways to honor our fathers, as Scripture tells us to do (Ephesians 6:2). One way, even if they're no longer with us, is to show respect for the values they taught us.

What can you do for your dad today to show him the kind of honor the Bible talks about? - Dave Branon

"We're thankful for our fathers, Lord,
They're special gifts from You;
Help us to show we honor them
By what we say and do."

The best fathers not only give us life - they teach us how to live.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

50/50 reaction... I Was blessed.. totaly would do it all again!

Thumbs Up


Smiles and encouraging nods

Some yelling "That's Crap" "THAT IS A LIE"  "You are being inappropriate"

One very irate women saying "What are you trying to do.. bring back back alley abortions, putting women in slavery! THIS IS a LIE, stop spreading it!  I will pray for God to forgive you for doing this"

One gentlemen asking, "You just want to keep women bare foot and pregnant and in the kitchen?"

Some saying, "Thank you for coming out and doing this" "Is it true? I will have to check in to that" 

Many people saying "Really!? I had no idea!"

One young lady "You guys are awesome, thank you so much." and like the Lord had his hand on her and knew just what we needed she offered us bottled water. (Lord bless that girl! She really encouraged and touched us)

One comment from a guy "Would serve them right" as if to say women who have had an abortion deserve to get breast cancer??

Abortion Is A Cause Of Breast Cancer!!  Why are Women Not Being Told?

Some of you may remember the post I did awhile back titled Race for the Cure foundation linked with the #1 Abortion Provider in America .  I had nooooo clue at that time God was leading me in a direction to actually be out spoken publicly about the Abortion Breast Cancer Link.  He has a way of just bring these things about, a plan that fits things together perfectly.  When I received an e-mail from one of the Ladies I did Silent No More with, asking if I wanted to help on a project she was thinking of doing I jumped on it.

After MUCH prayer and fellowship and pricing how much a banner would cost to make we decided to make one ourselves instead of pay almost $80 to have one made.  Didn't turn out too bad and I think it was effective.  And to give my husband credit he did help paint it. (THANK YOU JOSH!)   So what was our intention of going to the Race For The Cure Saint Louis, witch by the way almost 62,0000 people attended?  Just to get information out about this link between abortion and breast cancer.  That was all. Both Kim and I are at risk because we both have had abortions, like she said, she feels she could very well be one of those women next year fighting. We just held the sign and smiled and waved at ppl.  We took special care and were sensitive to not be around where the procession of survivors were going to be, because really they are victims. We didn't shout or become violent.  Many police passed us by and no one official ever asked us to leave.  I found my self praying and asking the Lord to just give me his Strength and Peace.  Being in a sea of people who potentialy could be offended by us can be some what nerve wracking.  Like I said it was about a 50/50 reaction, much better then we thought.  We were prepared for the worst.  I will have to post some other pics from down town that I got to take from the event. It really was interesting and BIG!   And a very beautiful day God gave us all with warm sunny weather. I can not calculate how many people ran and walked passed us and saw our sign but I pray that God put those in front of us who needed this info and that he would touch hearts and minds and open eyes.  

After the Race my friend wanted to see if her Catholic Church Group was still at Planned Parenthood.  They had a planned prayer walk from the Basilica to PP for that morning.  Now you have to know this is not something I do, I am not a militant pro-life person (as are the vast majority of ppl who are) but if you just go ONCE and talk to the ppl who actually stand in front of the "GATES OF HELL" you will be very surprised how it really is.  Very different then how the media portrays these ppl who are committed to stand and pray and give information out and hopefully help women.  

 My friend's church group had already left but there were a few ppl I did get to meet standing, and I must say I was very blessed for getting to see this side of Pro-Life Work so up close and meet the ppl who do it day in and out.  There was a sweeeeeeeeeeeeetttttttttttt old lady with her packet of pamphlets and roses that she would pass out to the cars going threw the gates and another 80yrd black man holding a sign quoting Mother Teresa, he was a very interesting person.  There was a married couple, David and Jenni standing there with their RV parked across the street full of baby idem and food and other free things available to help women.  I was very awed to hear that they adopted a baby from one of the abortion minded mothers they had met at this clinic.  There was another gentlemen just kneeling and praying away from everyone, very touching.    Gates of Hell.. In America every 23seconds an abortion is preformed.   You won't hear about the Abortion/Breast Cancer link in this clinic.. but interestingly in two states it is now required that the clinics notify their clients of it.     Bless you James for coming out here day after day!   Jennie and David Of Unborn Protection League.      Praying man.  America Needs more men such as him.    Kim and Me with our sign again.

Friday, June 17, 2005


Who were we kidding with even thinking we could get such a palace as that house?? LOL  Note to self.. don't let sales ppl.. no matter how wonderfuly attentive, get your hopes up like that.

Come to find out the grant program we are in doesnt even go out that far, and we would have to find a program for that area.  Looking threw the web and info on that program, they do have a limit on the price of the house you can buy with thier program... but they do give you more of a downpayment grant.. 6% vs the 3% the one we are in now.

We may very well still build out there, just a lesser of a house.  Josh is twisting and turning it all around in his mind.. checking the facts and crunching the numbers, walking other floor plans and models.  Personaly I am sick of thinking about it all and am just going to focus on other things for awhile.  Let him figure it out lol.

Any one see that new show on FX called 30 Days?? The same guy that did Supper Size Me is behind it.  Watching it this week about the working poor (this week's show was about those who lived on min wage) makes me feel guilty about even looking at a house and spending that much money and also makes me feel incredibly blessed.  That used to be me and Josh.  Maybe not that extream but I know how hard it is, we still live pay check to pay check most of the time.  Basicly that is how my sister lives but she does have a better job that pays above min. wage and gets alot of goverment assistance. Education, Education.. that was my whole thought threw that t.v. show.

Josh woke me up this morning yelling that my sister is NEVER allowed to visit again with sick kids.  One of her babies had the sniffels and now two of our children are running fevers and are sick.  The last few days Sophia has been spiking temps and just not feeling well and now Zane and I have caught what ever that is.


I am just about all ready for tomorrow and the project I am doing with my pro-life Catholic friend.  Don't want to give too many details away, but just know I will have many picturtes to share (I am planning on it anyway)  This has been a wonderful time getting to know Kim and fellowshiping with her.  Definatly God has put her in my life for a reason. 

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Must see Video!!! (thanks Lori for sending it to me)

 Video@AOL :  Can I live... EVERYONE MUST SEE THIS VIDEO!!!!!!  If you are off aol broadband click this link then... Streaming Videos : Nick Cannon - Can I live :: JAMAICA LIVE :: Weh di music STRIVE 



"Can I Live"
(feat. Anthony Hamilton)

Talking Ma
I know the Situation is Personal
But it something that has to be told
As I was making this beat
You was all I could think about you heard my voice

[Verse 1]
Yeah Just think Just Think
What if you could Just
Just blink your self away..
Just Just wait just pause for a second
Let me plead my case
It's the late 70's Huh
You Seventeen huh
And having me that will ruin everything huh
It's alot of angels waiting for their wings
You see me in your sleep so you cant kill your dreams
300 Dollars thats the price of living what?
Mommy I dont like this clinic
Hopefully you'll make the right decision
And dont go through with the Knife Decision
But it's hard to make the right move
When you in high school
How you have to work all day and take night school
Hopping off da bus when the rain is pouring
What you want morning sickness or the sickness of mourning

I Will Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I Would Say To You
I Will Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I Would Say To You

[Verse 2]
I am a child of the king
Ain't no need to go fear me
And I see the flowing tears so know that you hear me
When I move in your womb that's me being scared
Cause who knows what my future holds
Yo the truth be told you ain't told a soul
Yo you ain't even showing I'm just 2 months old
Through your clothes try to hide me deny me
Went up 3 sizes
Your pride got you lying saying ain't nothing but a migraine
It ain't surprising you not trying to be in Wic food lines
Your friends will look at you funny but look at you mommy
That's a life inside you look at your tummy
What is becoming ma I am Oprah bound
You can tell he's a star from the Ultrasound
Our Sprits Connected Doors Open Now
Nothing But Love And Respect Thanks For Holding Me Down She Let Me Live...

I Will Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I Would Say To You
I Will Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I Would Say To You
[Repeat 2]

[Nick Talking]

It's uplifting foreal yall
I ain't passing no judgement
Ain't making no decisions
I am just telling ya'll my story
My love life
I love my mother for giving me life
We all need to appreciate life
A strong woman that had to make a sacrifice
Thanks for listening
Thanks for listening
Mama thanks for listening

Monday, June 13, 2005

AOL News - Pop Star Acquitted on All Counts ohhhhh come on!!!! On all counts??? Was this jury bought?



OMG!!  I just worte this 3 page post and went to copy and past it to check my spelling and lost it allllllllllllllll!! I presed Shift C instead of Ctrl C.. and it all deleted! MAN!

Obviously I am not going to re do it all.  So here is the condenced version.

Sister surprised me with a visit at one of the worst times.  I had alot planned for this past weekend but it is ok.. I love to see my nieces anyway.  Took Zane and Annie to camp with my friend Kathy.. it was an allllllllll day trip.. 4 hours there and 4 hours back.  Sunday I said good bye to my sister and it was very emotional.  After church Josh and I decided to go house hunting further out west, in the boonies where you can get more hosue for your money.  About a 25 min drive from where we are now.

3 builders later we are almost sold on a house that may be too much for us but we are talking to the Finacning company they work with.  The builder offered to pay 10,000 in closing costs and for what ever else we may need to use it for, we may even come away with money, becuse they want to sell this house fast. It is a brand new sub div. being built and besides the model houses this is the second house built, and ready for moving in.  The more I look at it and think about it and dream about it and crunch the number, the more my hopes get up.  Nothing is signed yet but if all goes well we could close as early as July 18th.. a day after Josh advances to Journymen.

Basicly Pray for us!!!  If this is where God wants us to be that every thing will go smothly and if it is not where he wants us that he will lead us to where he does.  We are thinking even if we don't get this house we may build a lesser of a house with them and still be very happy.

Here is the floor plan..



 here is what the outside looks like execpt for the color is differnt.

In the house the master bathroom has the luxery option.. spa tub and shower stall and double sink.  See that walk in closet! It could almost be a room in of it's self lol.  The house has alll the options built in expect for the kitchen island.  We are thinking of turning the den and dinningroom in to a 5th bedroom for the MIL and leaving the loft open as a play area and office area. This house is HUGE compaired to what we were thinking we could get or even dream of getting.

Thursday, June 9, 2005

Going on my wish list..



Very cool anklets with MY COLORS in them created by the self-proclaimed Queen of pointless posting, Freely Florilia. Who knew that besides being very witty and ruley she also runs on the side a custom jewelry designs webpage???

*SIGH* but since we have to account for every penny we spend this week and  make a budget that is to be turned into and shared with the Home Buying Class next week, and I just spent too much on Josh I have to put this on the WANT LIST and hold off buying it.  OH WELL.  LOL Wish I could justify buying the bangles with the excuse that they would match every summer outfit I own.  I guess I will have to just think about the tan line I won't be having this year because I won't be wearing them *pout pout*

Wednesday, June 8, 2005

Just Ordered Josh's Father's Day Gift!!

*Gulp*  I just unloaded tooooooo much money, shopping online is way too easy sometimes. I tried to call Josh several times today on his cell.. to ask.. but couldn't get him and I couldn't wait any longer.. so I just did it.  BUT IT IS .. JUST PERFECT!!!  I don't want to give it away, because you never know when Josh reads this journal but one hint..   Sophia, my soon to be 4yrd, who Josh has warped into being a bicker chick already said allllll she wants to do for her Daddy is build him a bike (chopper), oh and build one for her too so they can ride together, a boy bike and a girl bike LOL.

It better get here in time for the Big Day!!  Now I have to start thinking of Anv. gifts.  Ugh.. what were we thinking getting marred so close to Father's Day.. AND his Dad and Step-Mom's Anv.???  We are supposed to go over there this weekend to celebrate.  Our anv isn't till the 15th but Josh is going to be out of town with Zane camping next weekend.

Tonight is our first home buying class.  I will try and not be board to tears and pay attention.  I don't know why, but my heart just doesn't seem to be into it.

Oh and like my new e-mail siggy??


Micah 6:8: He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God

Monday, June 6, 2005

This weeks New Journal Song

DC TALK: Day By Day

I live a simple life, I take a day at a time
I spend my mornings with God before I hit the grind
The subtleties of darkness never cease to amaze
As a physical world creates a spiritual haze

Blinded by distractions
Lost in matterless affairs
Reaching through the darkness
Trusting You will meet me there

Day by day, day by day
Day by day, day by day
Oh dear Lord, three things I pray [one, two, three]
To see thee more clearly [day by day]
To love thee more dearly [day by day]
To follow thee more nearly [I got to take it]
Day by day

You cruise around the corner
You watch your back

You sweep your feet down alley streets
Sometimes you creep, I never see you coming
Monday, man you're on my back
Like a knapsack strapped with my heavy burden

No, You cannot condemn me
I won't buy your bag of goods
You've got nothing for me anyway
That's why I pray

These three things
I do pray
Day by day

Day by day, by day, by day
[These three things]
Day by day, by day, by day
[I do pray]
Day by day, by day, by day, by day (2x) [it's one step out of time]

As you walk
Day by day
Go to God and pray,
"I'm gonna go Your way"

[I'm gonna pray]
See thee more clearly [every day]
Love thee more dearly [oooh, oh yeah]
Follow thee more nearly [I'm gonna go your way]
Does any body hear me?

Day by day, by day, by day by
Day by day, by day, by day by
Day by day, by day, by day, by day

[I know I'm always safe with you]
[One day at a time]

Allways Something... Lord fill this gap between wanting and doing.

Broken Air Conditioner and dealing with Landlord to get a repairman out, Repairman that looks at me like I am stupid, letter from school about Missed Chicken Pox Shots for school registration, phone calls with pediatrics saying she should of gotten it at age 1 but didn't, looking up health department info to get missed shots, getting kids ready for camps, finding a sitter for our Wed night home buying class that starts THIS WEEK, Bills, house cleaning, cooking, weekly shopping,stupid tv movies attacking my world views, play dates, hunting for boxes to start packing up the house, de cluttering, long over due letter writing to relatives, making plans for home fellowship meeting this Friday, keeping in contact with ladies about doing the sign for Abortion & Breast Cancer Link. needing to finished the questionier for that author about my abortion...

The list could go on and on.

And that list makes me sound busy but really I have been feeling lethargic, complacent, just BLAAAAAAAA.

Ever been in a place where you KNOW you should be approaching God in prayer but just can't seem to get there? I'll think.. Ok I know I need to spend time with you Lord, it has been way too long since we have really talked, but then something prevents me from going to that place, from me stripping it all down and just be with HIM.  I want to pray, I want to fellowship, I want to be in his Will, I want to be on fire, I want to walk in his power and strenth... but it seems there is a big gap between wanting and doing.  I use every excuse in the book and like there is this big road block up between Him and I, and where that leaves me is withering.

And I can just hear Satan giving a chuckle too.

To quote Tobby Mac, "God, take this place between you and me and FILL IT UP!"

(by list member Debbie Preuss, May 29, 2005)

Where is your focus, what do you see?
When you look around, do you feel free?
Focus on the Leader, His name is Jesus Christ
Focus on Him, you'll find the purpose of life
Never waiver from following, His precious frame
When you're weak call out, to His Holy name
No matter what happens, fix your eyes above
Look into His eyes, see His unconditional love
Things will come around you, to try and distract
Keep your eyes on Him, your life on His track
Don't miss out on the blessing, Hewants to use you
To do His work, as He makes your life brand new
Hold tightly to Jesus, when your sight grows dim
When you don't understand, simply cling to Him
Don't waiver from your focus, blessing will be yours
Jesus Christ will help you, for you He adores
He will be your strength, when you are too weak
He will be your fortress, when His arms you seek
Keep your focus on Him, He'll show you the way
If you are lost, just call out and pray
Keep your eyes on the Lord, keep your focus straight and true Reach out for Jesus, He's waiting for you


A "WOV Note" from Women of Virtue

Decide to Be Daring.  "Because of our knowledge of the Bible and because our hearts were attuned to God's leading in our lives, when God spoke to my heart, it was not ambiguous.  We heard loud and clear what the Holy Spirit wanted us to do -- we only had to choose to obey.  It felt like a risk, but that is what being daring feels like!  It was a risk well worth it.  Obedience is trust in the person of God.  The key question, the big decision point, is then, 'How well do I know God?  Do I really trust Him with all my life?  And if I trust Him, what is He asking me to do so my life reflects a life of character?'"

Pam Farrel, The 10 Best Decisions a Woman Can Make

This week's verse of encouragement:

"Abraham trusted God, and when God told him to leave home and go far away to another land which He promised to give him, Abraham obeyed. Away he went, not even knowing where he was going."
Hebrews 11:8 (The Living Bible)

"But if you are unwilling to obey the Lord, then decide today whom you will obey.  Will it be the gods of your ancestors beyond the Euphrates or the gods of the Amorites here in this land?  But as for me and my family, we will serve the Lord."
Joshua 24:15 (The Living Bible)

As for Me and My House we shall serve the Lord.. that is a vers that keeps coming up in my life.  I think I have seen or read or heard it at least 3 differnt times, in differnt places this week.

Saturday, June 4, 2005

Bad Hair cut mared me for life..

Weekend Assignment #62: We've all experienced regrettable hairstyles and haircuts. Relive a regrettable hair incident in your past for the amusement and edification of all. I was so mentally messed up by this hair cut that it took me until my 20's to allow my hair to be cut above my shoulders, this is why I hardly ever go and get my hair cut and why I always have long hair, not just because I am a cheap-o.  The story goes.. Me, 5yrd with beautiful long blond hair.. gum stuck in hair, lazy baby sister not wanting to comb it out with illusions of being a barber.  See Pic.

Extra Credit: Are you kidding? Pictures! Pictures all around!   I MEAN COME ONNNNNNNNN.. ALL THE WAY TO MY EARS!!!  AND THE BANGS!!! Could she of cut them any more crooked if she used a kitchen knife??   People thought I was a boy.. THE DUCH BOY!  Let me tell ya.. it did wonders for my self esteem and popularity.  Only for you ppl could I share such a pic (better love me for it!):

Sat. 6 Time

1. Who is the last performer you saw live in concert?  What is the last film you saw at a theater?  Which was more worth the money you paid? My daughter in her school play/concert and StarWars III.  Didn't have to pay for the my daughter's concert but it was too cute.

2. What do you do more of in a typical day:  work, sleep, eat, exercise. watch TV, surf the web? Too bad I can't get paid to surf the web.

3. Your office brings in a new drink machine and it's your job to fill the eight selection slots.  What drinks (non-alcholic, of course) do you select? Diet Pepsi, Mountain Dew Code Red, and Regular, 5 differnt flavors of Bug Juice (for the kids)

4. Take the quiz: 
What is your expression number?   Do you agree with the description it gives you?  What do you disagree with most?

Your Expression Number is 11

You tend to be associated with idealistic concepts and spiritual issues. You have high potentials that are somewhat difficult to live up to. You have very strong intuition and you can be a bit psychic at times. Highly inspirational, you can lead merely by your own example. You have an inborn inner strength and awareness that helps you advise others. Although you have what it takes for a successful career, you belong outside the business world. Overly sensitive and temperamental, you tend to have a lot of nervous tension. You dream a lot, so much so that you may be more of a dreamer than a doer. Fantasy and reality tend to get intermingled for you, and that leads to impracticality.

Wow.. I would say that is pretty much on target.. or at least what some may say about me.  Certainly lately I have been more of a dreamer than a doer but how that qualifies me to lead by example is something of an oxmoran to me lol. All the rest strokes my ego muy muy.

5. Counting all light fixtures and lamps in your home, how many bulbs do you have in place, and how many of them are on right now?  I would say 13 with 5 burnt out and two on now.

Laura: What is your favorite movie line ever and why? ohh that is a hard one.  Going to have to reach wayyyyy back for this one...

Labyrinth: Sarah says to the Goblin King relizing with perfect timing, "You have No Power Over Me"