Can you do it?

3 weeks of NO COMPLAINING.. what so ever?  That is the challenge put forth by my Pastor.  To be a thankful person and satisfied with each situation.. hold your complaining and bring your oughts up in prayer instead of feeding into negativity.  OUCH.  He insists if you can do it you will see a BIG difference in your life (and I tend to agree).

I am still super pissed at AOL and all that is going on with the journals. And I just haven't had the heart to write in my other blogs either.  Call me lazy and not wanting to put forth too much effort.. just yet.  I may very well cancel my AOL service.. working up to it.  I have been trying out first living with out the AOL software and doing everything threw IE and AIM.  But with the holidays coming I find myself melancholy and not really into learning anything new at this time.  I have too much new in my life right now.. new house, new schools for the kids, new friendships to develop, new situations with my husband, and I crave the familiarities of my journal. 

So before I go into my 3 week fast of complaining I am going to let out my feelings out about AOL and then move on.. just so they don't think I am satisfied with the mediocrities they have shoved down on us. 

AOL, shame on you.  You have no care for your loyal customers and I feel jaded.  Every time I see one of your commercials now I want to throw up.  I want these ad banners off  my journal.. ads that I don't support and feel very upset that you are not only taking my money that I pay for this service but also making money off my thoughts, feelings, my blog.  I will NEVER click on any of them and NEVER patronize any of the advisors and I will tell each of my family and friends to do the same.  I find your lack of concern for your customer base disheartening.  I have lost respect for the so called Journal Editors and AOL employees.  They have refused to truly address the journal community's complaints and  down play our concerns. To say publicly that AOL has only received a few dozen complaints over the ad banners has got to be the biggest joke I have ever seen in print.  You can ignore us your customers for only so long.. you WILL have to deal with the angst this has all caused. Hiding will only loose you more customers and word of mouth about how you treat those who have been loyal to you for years and your hunger for only profit will go across the globe.  Don't think because I am returning to my journal it is me throwing in the white flag over this issue.  I am unsatisfied and will leave for good if you do not do something more than put in small print a disclaimer about the ads.  I want them OFF and OFF for good.  They are in my e-mail box, journal alerts, the main screen, personal webpages, chat rooms.. my journal is the last straw.  If I wanted ad banners on my journal I could of set up a free AIM one.. which you had assured us when they were first implemented that the bonus of having a paid aol journal account was no ads.  I am cancelling all my premium services because I refuse to pay you any extra then I have to to keep my journal before I transfer all my entries.

AGAIN.. AOL.. YOU SUCK! TAKE THE AD BANNERS OFF THE PAID JOURNAL ACCOUNTS.

 

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Ok.. my 3 weeks of just being thankful has officially started with the hit of the save button.  If you catch me slipping.. hold me accountable. " ) 

Isaiah 61:1 The Spirit of the Lord GOD [is] upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to [them that are] bound

 

2 To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn

 

3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified

 

Click here to view Video

 

What Am I Thankful For???

 

When I was asked to get up and speak for a few minets about What I am Thankful for and share some of my testimony by Pastor, I of course had to say YES.  I immediately sat down and started to think of what I could possibly say and keep it short. I started to think back to where I used to be and just how far the Lord has brought me in my life, tears and praise started to flow and I can't help but smile.  I could go on and on all day about the many blessings in my life and some may think it was bragging.. when really it is me giving Glory to God.  Some one recently told me, "Mary you are a blessed person" My natural reply was "Ofcourse I am!  I am a daughter to the KING!"  And that is what I am most thankful for because I did not always know that truth and I did not always know him. 

 

That video that I asked them to play I found online and the first time I saw it I related to it profoundly.  For me I could of wrote that song and those could have been images of my own teen years flashing up there.  If you have ever seen that movie 13 you know it is basically about a young girl and she seems to grow into every parent's nightmare.  I was the wild child trying to escape my reality of a childhood with sexual abuse and unstable home life, looking to be loved in all the wrong ways and I look back and marvel at how on earth did I come out of some of the situations I put myself in with out serious harm. How even then God wanted to know me and was calling out to me and drawing me to him.

 

I am thankful for that divinely appointed day when a women in a big red van pulled up and asked me if I needed a ride and thankful that she befriended me and spoke truth into my life and never looked down at me or judged me and the state I was in at that time.  She only loved on me and showed me God's love. Before that day I was trying to live a good life but with many deep hurts and void of God's presence in my life.  I was A young wife with two children and the third on the way, trying to escape my past. Joshua and I trying to make ends meet with very little and seeming bound to repeat the patterns set down by the parents who raised us.

 

I am thankful for who ever wrote that song "Jesus Lover Of My Soul" and to the Holy Spirit who ministered to me threw that song.  The song that helped me realize that YES HE DOES LOVE ME.. HE WILL SET MY FEET ON A ROCK AND I CAN STAND ON HIS PROMISES AND HIS TRUTH.  THAT HE IS THE LOVER OF MY SOUL, THE LOVE I HAD BEEN YEARNING FOR AND SEEKING MY WHOLE LIFE. He loved me and died for me even while I was a sinner.

 

I am Thankful for the scar on my husband's abdomen from his appendix surgery.  It was shortly after that that he realized his mortality and his need for a relationship with The Lord. It was after that we became equally yoked and made God the center of our marriage.  A quickly answered prayer because it was only a few months before that I remember crying and asking what do you do when your husband is not a Christian.  Now I can look back and wonder how does ANY one hold a marriage together with out God in the center of it because with him in ours there has been Joy and Peace and a deeper Love.  I know most of the couples who get married at 19 much less any age are on the road to divorce but Josh and I even though getting married and having children young we seem to get stronger threw the years.. Going on 10 this June.

 

I am Thankful for each of my children.  They are each a special blessing and a joy and I am blessed doubly because I know that because of mistakes I have made in the past I may have very well been left barren if not for the grace of God.  Zane the brain and wise beyond his years, Annie gentle and soft-spoken, Lilly full of excitement and energy, Sophia my baby who demands attention and my first daughter, Beautiful who I will meet in Heaven when that day comes.

 

I am thankful for each of the trails God has brought me and my family threw teaching me to walk with him and base my life on his love and provision and not on earthly things.  For the times we did not know how were going to pay the bills or feed the children but some how he always provided. For God showing me to be content in each situation and to appreciate each blessing.  Growing me in him and learning about what is really important in life.

 

I am thankful for when my niece was kidnapped over that Christmas from the Chicago bus station and he taught me threw all that how to rest in his Peace and promises, to hear his voice, that when we pray he does listen and he is in control despite what circumstances or other people say.

 

Ofcourse I am thankful for the wonderful new house we moved into at the end of this summer.  I could have never dreamed of living in a house such as the Lord has blessed us with.  Most of my life I have moved from apartment to apartment and when he lead us to the house we rented in O'fallon for 3yrs that to me was a miracle but to have a house of my own, that I could paint any way I want, have a pet, a yard and neighbors, room for the children to grow and then some.. I still get overwhelmed by how he moves and gives us only good things. Neither of our parents settled in one place for long and my parents never owned their own home.. so even the thought of us buying a house was not wired into my thinking beyond dreaming.  I am sure Josh can tell you how I fought us even looking for a house to buy and how I just didn't feel worthy of a home of my own.

 

I remember once when I was 14 or so writing in my journal about a dream I had for my life.  Thewonderful husband who would love me and take care of me the right way, the beautiful children I would have and the happy home we lived in.  Me baking in the kitchen with a baby on my hip and the other kids playing in the yard with our dog and my husband coming home from work giving mea big kiss.  Like one of those opening sceens from a 50's tv show.  I cried because the thought at the time of having a stable idle life was too overwhelming and I just knew life was not like that and no one lived that way and I pushed that dream away.  Now I know no one's life is perfect and life is work but all these years later God has blessed me with my childhood dreams, like he took a page out of my diary and said.. yep.. this is what I am going to do in Mary's life.. in my timing, if she yields to me and learns and grows in me and draws close to me..

 

Life abundant is what I am thankful for.. the life he has given me.  Before I knew Jesus Christ I was living a dead life and all the things I tried to do on my own to make it better are indeed like fifthly rags compared to the work he has done in it.  All I can be is thankful and in awe of him and I know these are just shadows of what is to come still, when Jesus returns.

Uproar in J~Land.. May the people be heard!

Originally Posted Tuesday November 15*

"The higher powers snuck into MY extremely personal journal last night and like a thief leaving their mark, sprayed graffiti in the form of advertising on MY personal walls"  

THANKS Rebecca!! THAT FITS REAL WELL ON HOW I FEEL TOO!  

This will be my last entry with my PAID AOL JOURNAL ACCOUNT! The outrage is because I pay money for AOL.. mostly JUST so I can keep my Journal.  AIM screen names are allowed to have an AOL Journal for free.. so it is understandable that they would have the adds.. but hey.. I am a paying customer.. and this is bull.  This may just be the last straw and I may close my AOL account if this issue does not get taken care of.  Why pay for it when I can just get an AIM screen name?  

Until AOL hears the people of J~Land and resends the add banners to paying customer's blogs, you can find me over at MySpace.com and the mirror blog I have over there.  Sure there are add banners there.. but that is what I expect when I am not paying for their service!  

Here is the Link.. ~Oh Mary~   

*Updated* I am also going to give Blogger a try since that seems to be where most of the Exodus is heading. I will try them both out and see what one I like best.. I see pros and cons for each.   ~Oh Mary~ on blogger

I am sure you can find the RSS feed for them in lieu of journal alerts. Don't be lazy.. try learning something new for a change.

*a side note* It has been over 4 days since the supposed journal upgrade and I STILL have to use IE to make a post.  Ya, that really makes me want to stay with AOL.. not.  But I am still hoping that they will come to their sense and listen to their loyal customers and I can return to this space.. but I am preparing for the worst.

 

AntiJournalsAds

"Survey Like None-Other!"

 

 

 

 

 

The goal is to have this in every single AOL Journal. What do you have in common with others? Do you like the same things? Post this and put the title of your entry "Survey Like None-Other!"  This is a great way to introduce yourself to new readers!  

1. What sign are you?   Capricorn, but I don't live my life by astrology or even read horoscopes..but it is funny how if you read the description of my sign it fits me closely. 

2. What is your favorite color?  Purple.. the color of royalty

3. How many waffles could you eat in one sitting?  How many could I or should I?? LOL  I try to stick to 3 or less. 

4. Can you touch your tongue to your nose?  Nope

 

5. If you had to choose between cats and dogs, which would it be? Cats

 

6. What is something you have learned recently?  How to do the alphabet in sign language. 

 

7. What is your favorite quote? Hard to say.. there are so many good ones but the one currently gracing my e-mail signature is : Micah 6:8: He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God

8. What is your favorite entry in your own journal?  In my wholeeeeeee journal???? You want me to go back threw 2 1/2 years of entries?? Can I just do one from this last month or so?? LOL this one would be on my top ten list if I had a top ten list

Forgiving Yourself and letting God use you.

 

9. What color is your bedroom? Currently just plain white but we have plans to paint one of these days and put a big wall mural of a Tuscan Scene.  We are going to go for a greek/roman kind of theme too so likely we will have grays and whites and maybe some reds & purples.

 

10. Where is your favorite place to visit?   My friends up in Wisconsin or friends and family in Las Vegas

 

11. What is one thing you want to accomplish this year? Learn sign language well enough to hold a conversation with a def person.

 

12. Why do you write in a journal? MANY REASONS! First and foremost for myself.  To have a sounding board for my thoughts and feelings, a release and a place to be creative. Secondly for the community aspect, knowing that I have friends who read with care and can give me at least a little bit of adult interaction. And lastly to touch others and live out my faith and draw others to the Lord.

13. What is your favorite joke? Don't think I have one.. certainly not Blond Jokes.

 

14. Do you like the city or the country?  I am a city girl threw and threw.. I have to have a 7-11 on the every corner lol but I also like the country and the seclusion of it.  Right now I live in a state of in between.  I am kind far away from everything but my area is growing and in five years or so it will be more city then country.

 

15. What style is your house decorated?   Right now it is a hodge-poge of everything.  We just moved into our first house and are taking our time getting it the way we want it. It would be nice to have one of those look but don't touch houses but that is impossible with four children lol.  I think I am going to try and go for elegant in most rooms and country in the kitchen.

 

16. Who is your favorite artist?   I really don't know enough about art to have a favorite.  But I still appreciate art.

 

17. Can you pat your tummy and rub your head at the same time? Who can??? 

18. Are you a night owl?  Yes but I am trying to not be.

19. What is something you love in your house? (If you have a picture you get extra credit!) A painting my Grandmother painted. I inherited it.  Right now it is on top of my fridge and needs to be framed. See above picture.

 

20. Do you believe in God?   Yes. Here is a link to one of my personal web pages if you would like to know more and the why.

21. What hobby could you never give up?   My journal 

22. What color makes you think of Hope?  White

23. What color makes you think of Love? Pink

24. What is your favorite flower?  Lilacs.. makes me think of my mom and grandmother.

25. If you had one wish for the world, what would it be?  Perfect Peace.. but there will be none till the Prince of Peace comes.

26. Whats the best surprise you have ever received? I do not get surprised very often (ahem hint hint hint)  One of the best was a surprise birthday party when I was 15 my parents threw for me and another was buying this house. 

27. What can you cook like no-one else?  Umm.. cooking is not my thing.  I can make a real yummy spinonge dip.

 

28. What do you think about most?   It's all about Jesus.

29. Who is your favorite poet? Christina K. Brown  

30. And last but not least, if you could wrap yourself up in one word...what would  that word be?  Blessed

And what are Josh's top 10 Needs

My friend Jess gave me this idea.. she did a search on her and then on her hubby.  I know what mine say.. so Let's see Josh's too.   If you want to play along just type in your name  and needs in your search engine and pick out 10 phrases that come up.

1.Josh needs a new bicycle  (ohh so that is what I should get him for Christmas?? LOL)  

2.Josh needs a holiday or just a cuddle (I'd cuddle him if he was here!)  

3.Josh Needs Our Help and Prayer  (This is true!)  

4.Josh needs remedial spelling lessons pronto (LOL maybe that is why he won't start his own blog?)  

5.Josh needs a new television set (ya he has been wanting to get a newier one.  The color on ours in the living room is going funny)  

6.Josh needs a two-parent family that can provide structure (see a theme here??? LOL)  

7.Josh needs to explore himself to see what he needs (ya.. cuz I am not going to do it)  

8.Josh needs change of pants (yep because I am not doing his laundry)    

9. Josh needs to learn how to delegate better and how to respect his staff (um.. ok that could apply)    

10. Josh needs know there is a large community of supporters wishing him well, and waiting for his return. (This is the best out of all of them and the most ture!!!)

 

Mary's top 10 needs according to a web search

Mary's top 10 needs.. a web search  Got this idea off of Christina's blog.. freaky how true some of these are!  

1. Mary needs prayer  (YES! PLEASE)

2. Mary needs the Lamb in school  (Yep, think of my children)

3. Mary needs a two parent home  (ouch considering my last post)

4.Mary needs to be marketed passionately to national and international audiences (ya! more readers)

5.Mary Needs a Little Consistency (oohh ouch true true true)

6. MARY needs a make over  (that would be nice)

7.Mary needs to find out what the students think (um.. ok?)

8.Mary needs you in this area (it would be nice to have more of my friends in my area)

9.Mary needs a powerful, enduring culture of philanthropy (ya! show me the money)

10.Mary needs to be more diverse, more international and even more public  ( I dont know how you get more public then this.. but the webs says I need to be more.. so it must be so lol)

THIS prob is one of those entries I should save for my private Bitching N Moanings

I MISS MY MAN!