I hope everyone's Mother's Day was wonderful and blessed. Mine.. um well.. umm.. I don't want to sound ungrateful but.. needless to say my husband missed the mark. LOL Let's just say I was not too happy with him.. in fact barely speaking with him. I'll leave it at that. But I did have some very cute and wonderful home made cards and gifts made out of play doe from the children lol.
I was feeling a bit down as we were at church. Not really wanting to hear the sermon.. that was very interesting btw, I just wasn't there with it in my head.. ya know. It amazes me that God is always with me and shows me his love and that I am not alone when I feel my lowest. Sometimes it is threw a particular song that is special to me or a smile from some one or a squeeze of the hand from a friend or a scripture that is perfect for right then and there.
Here is the scriptures that lifted me up and reminded me just how loved I am..
Acts 3:2 And a certain man lame from his mother's womb was carried, whom they laid daily at the gate of the temple which is called Beautiful, to ask alms of them that entered into the temple; 3 Who seeing Peter and John about to go into the temple asked an alms. 4 And Peter, fastening his eyes upon him with John, said, Look on us. 5 And he gave heed unto them, expecting to receive something of them. 6 Then Peter said, Silver and gold have I none; but such as I have give I thee: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth rise up and walk.Acts 3:7 And he took him by the right hand, and lifted [him] up: and immediately his feet and ankle bones received strength. 8 And he leaping up stood, and walked, and entered with them into the temple, walking, and leaping, and praising God.
This scripture touches me on so many levels and those who know me well know why it is significant to me. You see.. I used to be like that old beggar..not in the physical sense but in the spiritual. Hurting and crippled even, from my past, begging God at his gates everyday.. forgive me, forgive me.. give me something.. anything that will get me close to you, that will help with this pain. I used the things of this world to try.. what ever would be dished out.. advice from friends, drugs and drinking, psychology, therapy,anti depressants,food, even trying to find joy in the family that I did have, any thing to fill that hurting void but nothing was helping. It was all temporary fixes. Then I learned the true meaning of Mercy and Grace. That it was all done threw Jesus Christ, and I was healed..my broken spirit was made whole and I saw you didn't have to beg over and over for forgiveness and I didn't have to keep beating myself up or working off a debut that could never be paid in full. To have that spirit of heaviness lifted.. it makes you grateful and your whole life changes.
It was special to me that Acts 3 was read at church on Mother's Day.. because I named my daughter that is in heaven after that temple gate, Beautiful. God knew what I needed that day and he met that need abundantly. Just like when I was sitting there searching for a name to give my child.. he knew and showed me that scripture.. .. I was told it would help my grieving if I asked God what sex it would of been and to name the baby. I remember it vividly, the searching for just the right name but nothing fit or seemed right. I was asked to go to a memorial service and I wanted something by then. I took a drive by myself and was praying and praying. I pulled into the parking lot of a "women's clinic" and sat there crying asking God to show me. I decided to read my Bible. I think I had just finished reading Matthew and being a new Christian at the time I wanted to know what happen next.. I turned to Acts and was reading and reading. As soon as I finished chapter 3 I was stunned. Beautiful, Beautiful.. that is what my daughter is. That is how God sees her and I think of her every time I hear those words. And what God did for that beggar is exactly, EXACTLY what he has done for me!
God is SO GOOD.. All the time!