Monday, October 24, 2005

I fall short all the time but tomorrow is another day, catching up with what is going on with me.

Yesterday the plan was get up for church at 10 and then drive to the In Laws for a planned family birthday party for Zane at 1 and then back all the way home and take the Girls to Awana's by 5:45.

I thought I was doing good and being a wise planner by making home made chicken noodle soup in the crock pot Saturday night.  I boiled a whole chicken and took the broth from it and added bullion and carrots and celery and then de-boned the chicken and separated it.. some for the soup and some for another dinner.. how thrifty of me.  I put the soup on high most of Saturday night and played on the computer till I was board.  Then I added uncooked noodles to the crock pot, turning it to low and went up to my room for bed.  I flipped on the tv. because I need the back ground noise to fall asleep.. the bed is very lonely with out Josh.  I found a new channel called Link TV.  I started to watch some documentary on Israel and Palestine.. a topic I am very interested in. I stomached the askew view of what was being spouted out at me.. I tried not to throw up and prayed that since the show was on so late others would miss that junk.  I don't know what time I finally fell asleep.. must of been late late. I forgot to set my alarm.

Next thing I know it is 11a.m. the kids are fighting on who pours the cereal and the milk.  I let them fight it out knowing going to church this week is a lost cause and drift back to sleep.  That was stupid.. I should of stayed awake because  when I did become fully awake it was almost 1!!  How could I of let that happen!!!  I dialed up my in laws and as the phone rings I tried to think of what I should say.. should I lie, what could possible be my excuse for being so late.  I told them we were getting a late start and were heading out the door now.. ugh.  SO I rushed us all to get dressed and after 15 min. of looking for a missing shoe we were on our way for the long drive to South County Saint Louis from Troy MO.

I don't drive hardly anywhere anymore and I forget how long it really takes to go places.  We left 35 min. after I had told my in laws we were heading out the door.  Again I was contemplating a lie to tell them for us being even more late.  After all Zane was to be the guest of honor and they were holding lunch for us.  Should I tell them I was half way to St Charles and had to turnaround because I forgot my wallet?  Should I tell them my van was having trouble starting?? Anything to make me look like less of a looser.  But I didn't, I just speed 75 miles an hour on the highway praying I wouldn't get pulled over and ticked (plus my plates are expired and my insurance needs to be renewed.. I would be in BIG trouble if I got pulled over) 

My guilt was eating at me as we pulled up at their house at 2:30.  Yesss it takes thatttttttt long to get to their house even with speeding but if my day was started as I had planned it, it wouldn't of mattered how long it took to get there. They open the door and the kids give them all hugs and kisses and the tables were set waiting for us to sit down.  I gave a big  hug to my step MIL and told her I am so so so sorry we are so late and feel really bad.. WOULD YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME, we missed church today and it threw me all off.  There I told the truth.. I didn't lie and she SAID.. oh don't worry about it.

We eat a very yummy meal with Josh's side of the family and had cake.. no ice cream because in my rush to get there I forgot to pick up some as I was asked.  After being questioned on why we are not going Trick or Treating this year (we have not done that for almost 3 years now and they know that) and other pleasant conversation it was 5:00 and time for me to rush the kids to Awana.  Our pumpkins we had painted were in the trunk of the van but every now and then if I made a sharp turn or stop one would roll under the kids seat.  Needless to say this caused the kids very much concern. We made it to the church in Troy that holds Awana at 6:00.  I was late again.  The pumpkins did fair well but could stand a touch up.  I dropped the girls off at their classrooms with pumpkins in tow.. only to find out.... THE CONTEST ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!  I was told a few times that they hope we do bring them back and to put them in a cool place so they don't rot. (I have 5 of them.. and I don't think I can find room in my fridge for them)

We got home and I was looking forward to the soup I had planned.  It has become fall weather chilly outside and hot soup would of soothed my wounds from the day.  I go to dish it out.. and find that it is no longer soup but stew.  The noodles had turn to total MUSH and there was hardly any broth. Uggggggggggggh.  See... I thought to myself all Saturday.. "Oh Mary you can't use the excuse anymore that you can't cook.. you have made some wonderful meals lately and this is going to be so good, Josh is going to wish he had not missed it."  I don't know what happen to my soup.. I guess I can still use that label as BAD COOK.  The kids picked at it and ate only a few bites.  The mush did not go over well and I am very disappointed that I had to throw it all out.

Josh called to tell everyone good night.  He had Sunday off and drove up from Rockford IL to Wisconsin to visit our friends that live up there.  Our friends are getting ready to close on a house next week and move in right away.  Since Josh is a painter by trade he helped them paint the town house they are moving out of. And he even watched the kids for my friend so she could go out for a little while with my other friend. I told my girlfriend that it is not fair.. he hasn't painted for me yet in my own house! LOL  I told her she should send something home with Josh as payback for my loss and her gain... she said.. oh no Mary.. You are a Saint now and don't do that anymore LOL.. temptation abated and I am glad, but after the day I had getting stoned sound pretty good.  As I talked to Josh and told him about the day and how I missed church and was soooooo late getting to his parents he said.. "OH, I KNOW" he had talked to them and in the course of their conversation it was stressed how late I was only like 3 times!!  So much for forgiveness huh (if you only knew the irony but I wont go there) but it is what I have come to expect.  My sweet husband told me not to worry about it or give it another thought (yet here I am thinking about it).

I am starting to really miss Josh and look forward to his return home.  I have parent teacher conferences all this week for the kids.  I wish he could be here for them.  But he is here in spirit and that is important too.  The bills have piled up and him working out of town longgggg hours is really going to help.  I got some paint am going to try painting our small downstairs bathroom with the Wall Magic kit Josh's mom gave us after she moved.  Maybe if I can't cook I can get a boost of self accomplishment from being all artsy and crafty?

Josh said the out of town job may now last till the FIRST OF THE YEAR! OUCH!!!  But he said the foreman was going on and on about how happy he is with Josh and promised that he would keep him on for the duration, something Josh is not used to hearing.  He is a hard worker but the previous company he was with had something of a jerk for a Superintendent and never gave complements or any type of appreciation.  So Josh got an ego boost.. I am happy for him.  Josh is coming home Nov 2nd but is only staying two days.  His graduation ceremony and dinner for moving up in the Union is on the 2nd at a nice Hotel so he is coming home for that event.  Even though he advanced to journeymen over the summer they hold the ceremony in November.  We are hoping to get all gussied up and have lots of fun and maybe even get a room. So at least I have that to look forward to.



  1. Well atleast you know what to do and are correcting it. I understand though I really do why things are the way they are nad I Know you miss josh greatly

  2. Gosh; you have a lot on your plate; try not to be too hard on yourself if a meal doesn't come out as planned. I think it was great you told the truth to the inlaws; that speaks volumes......and if your kids were listening, it speaks more volumes


  3. Who cares if you can't cook, you write a lovely journal. Thanks.