Wednesday, July 20, 2005

An attack or or an urgancy of the Spirit?

Needing some comments from those with a gift of discerning or those who have had this happen to them before.  This was a unique experience for me.

Yesterday was a normal kind of day for the most part.  Shortly after Josh was home from work and I was starting dinner I started to feel strange. I started to feel very heavy and light at the same time, like being fuzzy all over but still very aware.  If I was on drugs I would of said I was high, but no I have not used drugs in a very long time (nor plan to lol). I drink a glass of wine now and then but I had not had any yesterday. I was getting very concerned.  I even asked my husband to look into my eyes to see if they looked funny or if they were dilated.  I was the only one in the house feeling like this too.  So I don't think it was any kind of carbon monoxide or gas poisoning.  I felt restless and like I had to cry.  I didn't understand because I had no reason to cry or feel this way.  Josh asked if maybe I was having a panic attack because of the move.  I didn't think that was it.  I feel total peace about our move and am not worried about anything that I can think of.  I went outside and sat on our porch thinking maybe I just needed some fresh air. This feeling of heaviness and dread was just not leaving me or lifting.  I did notice the moon and thought it was pretty because it was so big, so I took a few snap shots of it. 

All threw this a verse from a song we sing often at church started going threw my head and I started to sing it out loud.. "And I shall not be moved, And I'll say of the Lord... You are my Strength, My Shield, My Portion, Deliver, Strong Tower.. My very present help in time of need..

After I came back in from being out side I tried to go about making dinner but I just couldn't focus.  This is about when my husband suggest I go and pray.  So I went into a room all alone and got on my knees but didn't know what to pray.  I opened my mouth and started praying in tongues.  It was flowing out of me.  Just so you know, I don't pray in tongues very often, neither in my private prayer time or in public so for it to pour out of me was a surprise.  I don't know exactly what I was praying but it was an urgent flowing prayer and as if something was grieving the spirit.. tears were rolling down my cheeks and then it grew to where all I could do was just weep and weep.  I do recognize that I was calling out to the Lord and said his name many times in a different tongue than I knew.  For those who have prayed in tongues you may know what I mean. I kept praying in tongues until the words would not come because I was coughing and felt like I was chocking and couldn't get air.  This is when I called out to Josh to  bring me a drink and that I could not breath.

Josh came into the room with me and I took a drink but I still felt like I couldn't breath. Then I started to weep again, almost wailing and then praying in tongues again.  Josh started to pray with me with his hands on me but he doesn't pray out loud so I don't know what he was praying.    Then I started praying in my normal language, asking the Lord to give me understanding, what did all this mean.  Then I prayed, Lord hold off your anger, prepare us, open eyes and hearts, call more to you to be saved.

I felt like something is going to happen and he is preparing me for it.  I have never had this feeling except one time.. the night before my niece was kidnapped and I had a feeling of dread and that something bad was going to happen, but it was nothing like THIS.

Also so you know.. this started BEFORE the announcement about who Bush nominated for Supreme Court Judge.  I heard some small blerp about it before and had wanted to watch the announcement live on the news channel.  I really feel that who ever was nominated, like our whole country's future hinges on who ever it will be.. if the President makes a bad choice God will not hold back his anger much longer after that but if it was a good choice the hedge may stay a bit longer. But none of that was on my mind when this happen and I missed it because I was praying when the announcement was made. If it is connected to that or not I do not know.  I don't know all the facts about Roberts to say either way if I like him or not.. but it is not if I like him that matters.. it is if God does.


  1. WEll Mary you know Im beginnig to think something is happening. YOU remember I wrote to you about an expeirnfce in brownsville. I asked you about it. Mary Im going to forward you a letter I wrote to my friend kim who is in a penticostal church so I asked her about my experience when you read what i wrote you will know we had a sorta similar experience The funny thing is that when I asked Todd what I should do with the experience this weekend he said ask someone but he felt maybe (that is why I asked kim and queston you too about it) that this was the beginning of something else. Well I never told Kim that and when she wrote back after my expereicne she said.............. Maybe this is the biginning of a bigger thing to to come. Almost excatly like waht Todd said. But IM forwarding you the letter so you know I wrote it a few days ago not to copy you.

  2. I copied this because this probably explains it:

    You said-

    "Then I started praying in my normal language, asking the Lord to give me understanding, what did all this mean.  Then I prayed, Lord hold off your anger, prepare us, open eyes and hearts, call more to you to be saved".

    I think it's because America is soon to come under attack.  It will change our lives forever.

  3. My first thought is that you were definitely in intercession for someone, or a situation.  When this happens to me, and it doesn't very often, I just have to stay in prayer and travail until it breaks.  Most times I never know who or what it was about, but sometimes God reveals a situation at a later time.  Funny that you mentioned panic attacks because for years I attributed all of my panic attacks to just being panic attacks.  As I've been in the Word and begun to grow into some of the giftings God has given me, I'm understanding that some of those "panic attacks" were periods of intercession that I didn't know what they were or how to deal with them.  Sometimes I have taken on some of the manifestations of the situation (shortness of breath, heart pain or palpitations), and it scares me, but if I focus back on what God is doing in me, through prayer, I can get through it.   It would be great to know why it happened or who it was about, but sometimes that isn't revealed.  Just  know you did what needed to be done.  :)

    Smart cookie, that Josh.  He knew exactly what you should do.

  4. Wow!!!  Sounds like the Spirit was moving thru you indeed.  I am always fearful when I pray in tongues if only for the truth that it reveals.

    But then I am Pentecostal....but you knew that didn't you?

    Be still and know that I am Lord.

    Hugs friend....yours in His Name.