Monday, February 14, 2005

My Entry for February's Artsy Essay..

Over at JudithHeartSong there is a contest with a theme.  This month's is write an essay on The Object Of Your Affection.  This is my entry.  Check out her link for more info and make an entry!

The Lover Of My Soul and an Invitation To The Marriage Banquet  

There was one, who fought fiercely for my heart.   The cost to him was great for he gave all of himself in the battle waged. For reasons known to him he found me worthy of the fight. He waited for me to come to him but I did not. He sent me love letters and invitations but I rejected them and scoffed. He sent friends to tell me of his great love for me, but I laughed.  He sent me gifts in packages you would not expect, but I sent them back saying I was not worthy of such things. He would knock on the door of my heart but I refused to open.   

With this great love for me beating in his chest The Lover Of My Soul watched sadly as I gave myself to others over and over again.  I will never know the sorrow he felt each time I turned away from his love and gave into the false lover who only hurt me with his lies. The very one he had fought the battle over and won, I had cheated with and walked with too many times to count. Yet his passion for me never wavered and he did not give up on me.  He knew I belonged to him and he pursued me gently, patiently, never forcing himself on me.   

I had a longing in my heart for him but did not know it was his love that I was craving. I tried to fill that void that was within me with the lies the false lover was feeding me. With each lie came a deeper hurt and with each hurt another broken piece of my heart fell till my heart was almost gone completely. I convinced myself that I could be happy even with the hurts this false lover inflicted upon me because  he made me feel good at times and I thought I did not deserve true, pure love.  Even with my back turned to him the Lover Of My Soul whispered to me, sang out to me how he longed for me to be with him and only him. Sometimes his songs would reach my ears and I would listen for awhile, wishing what he was saying was true and then I would go back to the lies told to me.   

 One day just for fun I humored a friend who told me of the one who loved me so deeply that he died for me and went with to hear songs sung of him. At first it was the most uncomfortable place and I could not understand the joy on the peoples face. Then there was that moment, the one that pierced my hurting heart, a song that played about the Lover Of My Soul and a tear fell from my eye.  Could it be true? Did he love me only for me? All others wanted some thing from my body or mind, all others hurt me in time. But His love, it didn't cost a dime? It was free and all for me?? How could that possible be?  

I took a chance and finally said YES to the one who had been seeking me and reaching out to me, to the one who loved me even when I did not love him. We finally met and I let him in and I have not been the same since.

There in none like him who could touch me in places untouchable. There is none like him who can send my heart and mind racing.  There is none like him who can bring such joy and hope into my life.  There is none like him who can touch my soul and make it dance and sing.  There is none like him who deserves all my love and affection. 

He is the Lover Of My Soul, a solid foundation, a constant faithfully friend.  He speaks to me and in his voice I hear softens and gentleness, his mercy and love for me.  He never lies to me but always tells me how it is. His promises are real and trustworthy.  I hold him to each one and he always has and always will keep his word.

Of all the  lovers who have come and gone in my life he is the one who has won out for my heart and very soul.  The Lover Of My Soul gave everything to have it and he deemed me worth while of his love to come to bring light into my dark world. 

His amazing love he sheds on me daily, with each heart beat, each breath, each sensation.  His gifts he bestows upon me freely and with out demand. He gives me Peace when all others are in worry. He gives me Joy when sorrow is about to over take me.  He gives me Clarity when in times of confusion. He gives me his Love when I did not deserve it. He gives me Wealth that is immeasurable with gold or silver.  He gives me Living Water so that I may never thirst again.  He gives me the Bread of Life so that I may never hunger. He gives me garments of Praise and clothes me in glory.  He takes the shattered pieces of my life and perfectly fits them into place and Heals the hurts that had been afflicted upon me.

Oh how it makes me sad when those would spit on The Lover Of My Soul's name, when they would make fun of our love, when they hate him because they do not understand.  All that I endure is well worth it for I know He loves me.

How can I not give him all that I am and will be?  How can I not follow him where ever he may take me? How can I not live for him when he lived for me first?  Yes, I give this object of my affection everything and I want to honor him with my life, not just today but everyday and in all I do. He is my passion, my lover, my strong tower, my healer, my redeemer, my friend.  He is my Lord and only to he will I bow.  I cast all the cares I have of this world to him and he helps me bear it.

He calls me many things, his child, his servant, a joint heir to his kingdom but my favorite is his Bride.  I wait for our wedding day, the day The Lover Of My Soul will come to take me to the place he has prepared for me and the day we shall eat at our marriage banquet.  I will not let the ruler of this world seduce me away from my groom with lies and false promises.  I will hold fast until the very end.

He is many things to me and I can not hold him to myself but share this love he has placed inside of me, that is bursting out. He doesn't just love me and complete me but he loves everyone who would accept  his love. He longs for all to join him at that marriage banquet. All are invited but not all will come. 

Everyone can have his love and be his Bride, but not all do.  Will you share in the banquet with me that is to come? Or will you be one of those who will be standing out side banging at the door after they have been closed and it will be too late to enter? The invitation is still open, will you RSVP for this important event.  He is knocking at the door of your heart right now with it in hand, will you take it?

"Jesus, Lover Of My Soul... Jesus I will Never let you Go... You taken me from the miry clay, set my feet upon a rock and now I know...  I love you, I need you...  Though my world may fall I will never let you go...  My Savior, my Closet Friend.. I will follow you until the end."


  1. Dear Mary, thank you so much for writing this beautiful essay. I am honored that you chose to take part, and am so glad that you shared your love. judi

  2. This is simply beautiful.  Thank you.

  3. A beautiful entry.  ~Sie

  4. Beautiful essay.  I"m glad you found your way.  Paulette

  5. Amazing. Simply amazing. Now I don't feel like such an idiot. lol I decided that instead of giving into the typical teenage thing, I was going to have Him as my "boyfriend". So I asked Him out and, wouldn't ya know it, He said yes. So I've been dating Christ for 12 days now. And everyone that knows thinks I'm insane. But now I don't feel quite so weird. "He calls me many things, his child, his servant, a joint heir to his kingdom but my favorite is his Bride." <~ my favorite line..... I'm glad you've found your way. Keep telling people about their invitation. Sometimes they seem to get lost in the mail and one of His children must reiterate the information.

  6. You're right, Mary, what I wrote is very similar to yours.  Amazing!  I've had the song, "Jesus, Lover of My Soul," in my head off and on for several weeks.  Thanks for the link back to your article.

  7. Wonderfully written!  I love this entry!  Think I'll link to it on my sidebar.  What a witness!  What a testimony!  -  Barbara