Thursday, May 12, 2005

Ho Hum

After writing yesterday's post I was in a sad, depressed mood all day that carried into the evening and bed time.  I did go to bed with Josh at a decent hour and as soon as we were all snuggled in for the night the phone rang.  I ran out to the kitchen before the phone hit it's 4th ring, before the voice mail could pick up.  (really they should have it so we could set it for a few more rings, I am always missing some ones call because I am slow to get the phone)  It was one of the ladies I had invited to go with me Sat.  She called to thank me for the card but to say she had to work Saturday (no surprise to  me).  I told her that was ok, I figured that but just wanted her to know I was thinking of her and thought it would be nice to invite her anyway. (I secretly thought maybe she had read my journal entry lol she does have a link to it)  We chit chatted for a few min. and then it was back to bed for me.

Beaches is not a very good movie to watch when you are already feeling sad about not having close friendships.  Josh tried to snuggle on me and asked what is wrong.  I had told him earlier in the day that I was not feeling well, that I was coming down with something and that is half true.  I wanted to cry on him and tell him what was really on my mind but just couldn't seem to muster it up.  He told me he loved me and kissed on me and that helps but I just was not in the mood to get frisky.  I should of told him I needed a date night, a night out with just him but I know we can't afford that right now and he is working mass over time this week and weekend, so I didn't bother asking.  I fell asleep just before the end of the movie... darn.

Thanks for the loving comments yesterday too.  But just for the record the ladies I had invited, but maybe one, are not really Christians, so I really don't hold it against them for not wanting to come to something I invited them to at church or for them having busy lives. And as I was telling an online friend yesterday..

The way I see it is we are all hurt and damaged ppl walking around this planet and all we need is God's love to shine threw and touch us, but the problem is no one wants to make the efforts to reach out to one another.  Satan has us busy running around doing things that make our life so busy that it is impossible to have those relationships and we are missing out or we isolate our selves because of ourhurts and think that is the only safe place for us.. and that is wrong also because I think we hurt ourselves more by denying ourselves those relationships and love from other ppl, because when you do have a real good friend your life is so enriched.

Well... I have mass cleaning to do today since my mother in law is coming into town this weekend, so I better get to it.  Today is also pay day so I am waiting on the mail to get his check in to the bank.  I am praying that for once they come early or even on time.  I am happy that relizing my son forgot to take out the trash lastnight I hurried and took it out myself this morning.. just ten min. before the trahsman came.. so I got it out on time!  That is at least one up side to my day so far.

2 comments:

  1. alilcountrycharmMay 12, 2005 at 11:55 AM

    {{The way I see it is we are all hurt and damaged ppl walking around this planet and all we need is God's love to shine threw and touch us, but the problem is no one wants to make the efforts to reach out to one another.  Satan has us busy running around doing things that make our life so busy that it is impossible to have those relationships and we are missing out or we isolate our selves because of ourhurts and think that is the only safe place for us.. and that is wrong also because I think we hurt ourselves more by denying ourselves those relationships and love from other ppl, because when you do have a real good friend your life is so enriched. }}

    Wow Mary! This is so true! Your insight never ceases to amaze me ;o)  Your such an inspiration!
    (((Hugs)))
    ~Angel

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  2. Ihope you can find someone. after 20+ years I have given up on a friend to run around with and just enjoy my j land friends.I find great comfort here. I told Todd about our converstation he said Gee Lori you were not very encoruagning.  sorry about that I just cant say whats not there.

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