Saturday, August 28, 2004

More from the Garage and some drible..

Those are some of my drawings.  I have a few more but that was all I felt like scanning tonight.  I know poor quality lol thus they have been in the garage all this time. I also added some pics that took me wayyyy back lol.  My fave is the one of me and Zane.  *poutylip*  He used to be sooo little, now he is almost 10!  It's been fun looking threw my old pics.  Wish back then I could have saw myself better.  I would have smiled more I think.  I know why all those good pics have been locked away lol because they piss me off!  As they say "Youth is wasted on the young"

I have discovered MusicNet@AOL.  I was sick of not being able to hear the full songs I was looking for last night so I clicked the link.  Free for a month and then $8 afterwards! But you get to download just about any song you can think of!  Darn AOL, just like a drug dealer, give you the first taste for free and then when you are hooked charge you up the waazoo for it.  When Josh heard "I Adore Mi Amor" playing he was like, are you STEALING music! LMBO NO.. It's free, for the first month, but I PROMISE TO CANCEL IT! He said ya right I have heard that one before. lol (ya so) But I have been soooo enjoying the music and getting drawn back into time and also discovering new favs.  I should start yet another journal just for songs and lyrics lol but I wont. I have too many to keep up with as it is.  I guess this is just my musical week huh!  I still have to post my fav song from Carmen by ABP. Can't seem to find it on the net.

I haven't really been feeling myself lately.  I am having trouble sleeping and eating and yes even trouble drawing closer to God.  So much has been swirling around in my head and I can't even begin to write about it nor will I probably ever here.  It is good Josh is back home now.  I am sure that will help.  He allowed me to take a very longggg bubble bath today (finally got that in) and I listened to Carmen and lit candles and drank my last margarita cooler.  I had a good long internal conversation with myself.  I think I have settled a few things but you know how your flesh and your spirit like to war with each other. Please keep me in prayer, that I will find my way back on the path that I wondered off of.  You know it's bad when those church marques start to mean something to you when you drive by them.  This one said, Keep the faith and finish the race.  And I just started crying after I read it.  I guess it doesn't help that I have pretty much missed two weeks of church lol but I will make it tomorrow for sure.  It isn't anyone thing I can pin down and tell you about, I know it kinda started when Mom went into surgery and even though she is doing wonderfully it has been down hill for me. Weird huh.  You think I would be on my knees every day praising him about that. Oh I do praise him for it, but I also feel like I am slipping.  Time for Mary to rediscover her Identity in Christ and start living by his will, not mine.  There is this big religion post going on over at Pat's journal and I am so not even in a place to contribute to that.  Normally, you know me, but I just can't tonight.

Heard another awsome song today!  I was taking the very, very, very, long way home from the store and flipping threw the stations.  This is the first time I have heard of this artist and they said the song is new.  I recomend you finding it and listioning to it..

Daughters by John Mayer
Album : Heavier Things
I know a girl She puts the color inside of my world She's just like a maze Where all of the walls all continually change And I've done all I can To stand on her steps with my heart in my hands Now I'm starting to see Maybe it's got nothing to do with me Fathers be good to your daughters Daughters will love like you do Girls become lovers who turn into mothers So mothers be good to your daughters too Oh, you see that skin? It's the same she's been standing in Since the day she saw him walking away Now she's left Cleaning up the mess he made Fathers be good to your daughters Daughters will love like you do Girls become lovers who turn into mothers So mothers be good to your daughters too Boys, you can break You'll find out how much they can take Boys will be strong And boys soldier on But boys would be gone without warmth from A woman's good, good heart On behalf of every man Looking out for every girl You are the god and the weight of her world So fathers be good to your daughters Daughters will love like you do Girls become lovers who turn into mothers So mothers be good to your daughters, too So mothers be good to your daughters, too So mothers be good to your daughters, too

4 comments:

  1. part two I dont think you expect all four to be artists and all four to love the color blue, and all four to love the same songs, and all four to pray the same time of day and for the same things. all four to sing the same songs and like the same songs. God dont expect that eitehr. There is more I could say on this subject but would be better in email and person ifyou wish. But sometimes I think the worlds view of church and most peoples in fact is that we be paper doll cut outs of what THEY think ought to be done!!!!!!! how it ought to work!!!!!!!!!!  We are not cars we are not machines we do not all function the same. Suffice it to say that ........... you got to give yourself a break and make sure that condemnation for things you do is from GOD not the world and thats very hard to separate. Make sure you studied and the leading of GOD from YOUR heart. (for me a beer and a bath always opens me up to HIM) you know me and bubble baths at night. LOL I will tel you this. There have been two times in my life that I HTOUGH I ought to wear only dresses. I put that on my kids even. I thought I ought to  not drink and we lived that life. No tv even no non Godly music no this no that. NOW I relaxed and i fEEL GOD!!!!!!! if you wish to talk just email. I ll be glad to share more.Lori

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  2. part oneOkay I love the pics and yes you and zane even look so much a like in that one pic.cue ball was a cute name. AND that honest after the party pic is awsome Ithink its neat you post the good and bad. I dont like to smile in pics alot either. Now about the slipping thing........ first you have been under alot of stress your self lately. but second I have lived thru my 20's an d 30's trying to be what the "church" "Religion" and worlds opinion of what God and his "RULES" are. I am 42 "UGH" and finally finding myself in Gods eyes and relaxed about what I see he expects of me how he views things. I quit letting othrs make me feel guilty for what thier opinon of God is. I never felt perfect enough> Now the fellowship we are at has people who are more strickt about what they are doing. and they have peple who are more lax about it. Some drink some dont. some smoke some dont some observe feasts and festivals some dont. Some dance some dont some do charimatic and some dont. Do you expect your kids to be paper doll cut outs of each other?????????

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  3. Nice drawings. I would love to be able  to draw but just not good at it. I have a sister who has never had a lesson in her life and can draw anything. She's sold a lot of her paintings.   Take care. Hugs. *Barb*

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  4. I didn't know you were an artist as well!!  Soooooooooo many talents for on li'l chica!!  :)

    That Happy Chica,
    Marcia Ellen

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